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Meanwhile, somewhere in Singapore where our reporting team leader is still thinking that what has happened in Indonesia last week was just some kind of “tumbled up and down … in some small towns where supply is low”. Eating Singapore breakfast, watching Singapore TV, in peace.

Under his brilliant leadership, the whole reporting team actually went downtown to shop for luxury goods taking advantage of the historical low exchange rate (while everybody else is crazy hunting for necessities – how ironic?!) when he was still around in Jakarta.

That was then, this is now.

FeDee : Selamat malam. This is FM 107 and you are listening to World Wide Wilf Radio Station. Time now is ten pm and we are going to have a live broadcast all the way from Jakarta.

FeDee : Hello, Wilf. Are you there?

*(%)#$(#*)#$*)$) // transmission problem

FeDee : Hello? Can you hear me?

Reply : // (*&)(*(*& // Yeah, I can hear // )*&( // you clearly. Am I on air?

FeDee : Yes, Wilf. What’s up in Jakarta? I heard you guys have done some luxury shopping when Rupiah hit 10,000 against USD. Is that right?

Wilf : Damn right! Everybody here was crazy shopping for luxury goods last week.

FeDee : How come?

Wilf : The goods were very cheap then. Imagine, a CD just cost a mere 4 US dollar. Also, rumours said that the Indonesia government would change 1,000 Rupiah into 1 Rupiah like back in the 1960s.

FeDee : That’s confusing. How’s that going to implement.

Wilf : Basically all your savings in Rupiah will be divided by a thousand and they actually cut the bank notes into halves before you could use them. Pretty scary. On that particular night, we were warned to return home early and our driver had deserted us.

FeDee : So, is it still very advisable to buy luxury goods there anymore?

Wilf : Depends, like my colleague who wanted to buy a pair of GUCCI shoes, the price went up double overnight. Old stocks with new exchange rate. That is so crazy. And our reporting team leader wanted to buy a “Kijang” (8 seated car) that cost only 45 million Rupiah. But the price went up to 90 million overnight.

FeDee : But it is still very cheap right?

Wilf : GUCCI?

FeDee : No, the Kijang.

Wilf : Yeah. With an exchange rate of, say, 7500. It is just merely USD 12,000. But few days ago, it was just USD 4,500.

FeDee : Tell us, do you feel any change on the street. The atmosphere for instance.

Wilf : Well, the Marlboro girls dress in red and white still out on the street promoting cigarette with free gift and so on.

FeDee : Oh really?

Wilf : Yeah, I ain’t joking.

FeDee : Come on. Seriously, what’s on the street?

Wilf : There are armies guarding in front of malls. Those who are with real guns. We saw a couple of Marine Troops last Thursday as well. Wonder why. We thought the army may not be sufficient.

FeDee : Okay, Wilf. As time is running short here, let’s get to the most exciting question. Is there any foreseeable riot over there?

// )(*)^&^&(*) //

FeDee : Hello, are you still there?

Wilf : What riot? // *&^*#@&%! // Where?

FeDee : Wilf? Can you hear me over there? What’s wrong with the phone?

Wilf : Tell me about it! This phone line is pretty coc //&^$#(// up. I can’t even make any decent connection to the email server. Oh, back to riot. You see, there are a lot of rumours around us. People say that the government is trying to hold the price of the necessity during the fasting month. But the prize of goods will go up double after that. The unemployment rate is already high and if the people don’t have enough money to buy food, there is only one way for them.

FeDee : To riot?

Wilf : Damn right as they have virtually nothing to lose.

FeDee : But surely there are police or even army? Right?

Wilf : After some in depth research, I was told that the army will mostly give way. After all, report says that they will only protect those buildings which the owners have paid them.

FeDee : Paying the army to protect the building?

Wilf : Yeah. That is the way it is done here.

FeDee : Have you done any research as in how riot erupts?

Wilf : You bet. The general pattern is that someone will hand out flyers bitching here and there. Common rage is not difficult to provoke under this bad situation right now right here. People hit down the street robbing everything they can, attacking shops and most likely, end up killing the Chinese.

FeDee : This is pretty gross.

Wilf : That is right.

FeDee : Relating to Chinese I can imagine. Is that always the case?

Wilf : Well, sometimes it relates to religion. For once, the Muslim went up against the Christian attacking the churches. And you know what the funny thing is?

FeDee : What?

Wilf : That day, they attacked the church and when the time to pray came, which is five times a day, they ceased the fight and pray. The attack continued after the prayer.

FeDee : Scary concept. Hey, Wilf, time is really running out here. Is there anything you want to add on?

Wilf : Yeah, to my reporting team leader in Singapore.

FeDee : What’s that?

Wilf : The bank that we all put our saving in? It is having some kind of unfavourable ranking from the government. Those of us who are currently here has already taken out what we can. Well, not the fixed deposit though. People are rushing off to take out money. //^*@#@&// QUICKLY COME BACK. //&^%&@//

FeDee : Oh, is that all?

Wilf : I guess.

FeDee : Thanks, Wilf. That will be the end of the live report from Jakarta. Thank you for listening and there may be more coming. Back the music, and the next song is brought you by Celine Dion, “My Heart Will Go On”, from the love theme of “Titanic”.

Note : Reporter Wilf is a specialist in riot and terrorism. Back in the mid 90s – IRA terrorism in UK. Year 97, Algerian bombing in Paris and year 98, Jakarta where riot is brewing every day.

> connect WWWIS

Connecting to wwwis@jakarta …

/* Welcome to World Wide Wilf Interactive System at Jakarta */

General broadcast :

Hi there. Long time no interact. First of all, welcome to all the newcomers for I have made some amendment to my address list. To those of you just joined in, this system has been running for going to be one year and is where we all voice out our opinions and interact with each other with no geographical boundary.

> list topics

1. Thinking about Y2K
2. Talk about Diana and Mother Teresa
3. Solar car from Honda
4. Fork
5. Of Human and Animals

> go topic 1

** Thinking about Y2K **

This is going to be another interactive question of the week.

Many people may have already planned for the 1999 New Year Eve and 2000 New Year Day. Have you?

Hence the questions are :-

On the 1999 New Year Eve

1. Where would you like to spend?
2. Whom would you like to spend with?
3. And how?

Also, on the first day of Year 2000, the same set of questions apply.

Just send in your remarks and I will compose a single newsletter kind of stuff. If you wish your name to be omitted, just tell me so.

In 1836 a New York preacher named William Miller predicted that life on earth would end in 1843, but it never came true. The same person announced later on that Christ will come sometime in 1844 but the trumpet never sounded.

Jehovah’s Witnesses’ founder, Charles T. Russell thought the world would end in 1874 and subsequently predicted the battle of Armageddon in 30 years’ time. WW1 broke out on cue.

On and on, people predict when the end of the world should be and we are about to reach the next millennium. Now, is it for better or for worse?

Wonder what the first song and movie will be on the first day of Y2K.

> send reply to topic 1

Please type : Sleep through the millennium on my own, in my own bed.
^Z

Reply sent. Thank you for participating.

> go topic 2

** Talk about Diana and Mother Teresa **

A tribute to the loss of two important ladies of our time.

[computer will be silence for a few minutes]
^Z^X^D^Cfskafjlsafsafljfla

[please be patience, this is suppose to be serious!]

Maybe due to my lost in touch with the reality, I never know that Diana actually walked the mine field and had close contact with the AIDS victims. (Or that’s what it seems.) Just like a piece of artwork which will never get famous until the painter dies.

And the last words of Mother Teresa? “I can’t breath anymore”. Thought she would say something like : May God bless you all.

Anyway, do you think that the moaning has been overdone? You will know what I mean if you tuned into CNN during that period.

> go topic 3

** Solar car from Honda **

This really shocked me. I have seen an ad regarding on the solar car from Honda. Man, it is finally gone commercial. And if you do have a chance to look at the ad, the shape of this commercial solar car is pretty much like an UFO.

Powered by nothing more than sunlight, the Honda “Dream” drove through more than 3,000 km of Australian desert having an average speed of just under 90 km/h.

Just been wondering how this kind of vehicle can be manufactured if we do run out of petrol one day. And imagine what the world would be if we have to rely on solar power.

Back to basic, perhaps.

> go topic 4

** Fork **

Sometimes, conversation can become quite misleading and this is a true situation. Hope this topic is not getting too technical though.

One day, I was grabbed by one client and she complaint that the application did not work.

True enough, it did not. After some simple diagnose, I have found out the problem.

Me : Ah, you’ve got a forking problem.
Client : Forking problem?
Me : Indeed, it is.

And I brought up the terminal and showed her the actual error message.

Client : What is the forking error?
Me : It says – you cannot fork anymore.
Client : How about your computer? Do you have the same problem?

Being very reluctant to walk all the way back to my working place (which I did), I tuned into my own terminal. After showing her that I have got the same problem, I turned to my fellow colleague.

Me : Yo brother, I can’t fork no more, can you fork?
Col : It’s your problem man, let me try.

After a while …

Col : S**t, it says – the system cannot fork any processor.
Me : Yea, me too.
Col : What is forking? What the fork does that mean?
Me : Hmmm, does the error message say very clearly?
Col : Forking hell, can we solving this forking problem?
Me : Hey …
Col : Can someone look into my forking problem
Me : Relax man …
Col : Fork you. CAN SOMEBODY SOLVE MY FORKING PROBLEM!!!
Me : Shit

> go topic 5

** Of Human and Animals **

There is one Safari in Jakarta. Pretty huge and impressive. You can actually drive in and feed the animals in the car with bananas and carrots.

After feeding the animals for a few hours, we were very used to throwing food out of the window or to attract the animals to our car. The sheep like creatures are quite proactive and they usually came and approached us. The tigers on the other hands just kept on sleeping (even after got hit by my banana missile).

And imagine you have been doing this for over a few hours. We have actually forgotten the existence of human species. At the end of the journey, we finally did see some native locals lying on the grass taking a nap. Having forgotten the difference between human and animal, I actually had the tendency to throw the bananas to them. How bizzare!

And I stopped myself at the last minute.

> disconnect

Thank you for using WWWIS. Please send in your response and it will be fun.

World Wide Wilf Interactive System (WWWIS)

To those of you who may need some soul nourishing stuff, here is one gem I have picked up lately.

“… One has only to accept a simple fact: Love … shows us the way. Our defects, our dangerous depths, our suppressed hatreds, our moments of weakness and desperation – all are unimportant. If what we want to do is heal ourselves first, so that then we can go in search of our dreams, we will never reach paradise. If, on the other hand, we accept all that is wrong about us – and despite it, believe that we are deserving of a happy life – then we will have thrown open an immense window that will allow Love to enter. Little by little, our defects will disappear, because one who is happy can look at the world only with love – the force that regenerates everything that exists in the Universe.”

– an extract from The Valkyries by Paulo Coelho.