Category: Diary

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Diary From the Attic

I Will Survive

Totally ridicules!  If not for Francis’s phone call and the room service phone call, I would have slept until God knows when.  Finally I woke up at seven pm.  Had a long hot shower and rushed off to my favourite Japanese restaurant.  One thing good about going to the same restaurant all the time is that they treat you really good.  Extra sushi and free cup of tea.

And the next thing was rush to watch a movie.  Wanted to watch the “5th Element” by Bruce Willis but it was full. So I watched “Shine”.  Very touching movie.  With the ticket voucher given (lent) by Aurore, I’ve got a really cheap bargain.

Annie’s email is always so practical and always reminds me of the cruel reality.  She even suggested that I shall stay in YMCA instead.  Alright, this is when the reality bites.  I shall survive.  I will survive.

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Diary From the Attic

Home Sweet Home (at a Hotel in Paris)

First day of work after a long holiday.  I was in general a very jolly mood although the weather was very bad.  Not much heavy work and in the name of “knowledge transfer”, I am not suppose to work on any SIRs.  Great, isn’t it?

Confirm that JP didn’t send me letter, nor did she send me an email and there is no Octel message from her.  Hence confirm that she has gone from my life.

Grace called and told me that there will be something exciting happening tonight.  First four of the BNP team members (plus one client) arrived at the Irish Pub (and Restaurant) twenty-five minutes late.  Of course, I waited for a while and started siting down and order my food.

Grace they all arrived well past nine and we all had a great time.

The hotel management has moved all my stuffs back into my old room and spent a while unpacking most of my stuffs.  Home sweet home.

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Diary From the Attic

Flying Back from American to Paris

With the time difference (9 hr), it is kind of hard to say what is yesterday.  But technically, it was last morning when we have to get up early and drove to the airport.  Colin has been quiet since – May 4 – and he didn’t try to make any conversation at all.  It is very strange to me and I kept on thinking that maybe it’s me who has done something wrong.  On the other hand, maybe it is his personal reason.  Just that what a pity that the holiday ended that way.

Quite a long and adventurous travel for me as I have to fly from LA to Chicago and from Chicago to Paris.  Really surprised that my luggage can be automatically transferred through as the first trip was American Airline and the second one is Air France.  (Although at the end, the Air France part got confused and my luggage was the last one to come out.)  Watched Pulp Fiction a few times on board.  And the air hostess was drop dead sweet with a very nice smile.

Got back to my beloved hotel and my old room will not be ready until tomorrow.  Went for a haircut and my favourite barber was not around and I ended up with the one who can’t speak English at all.  Lucky Eric came out at last and it wasn’t too late.

Called up Sophie and she even wanted me to come to work in the late afternoon.  Crazy.

Called up Mohamed and we had an Indian food.

Tomorrow – back to work!!

Before I stop, I do receive 74 new mails today.  Wow!

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Diary From the Attic

Sea World at Saint Diego – So So Experience

The Sea World in Saint Diego isn’t that fantastic.  Dauphins and Killer Whales (Orca), Sea Seal and Sea Lion.  I have seen all back in Ocean Park, Hong Kong.  Anyway, it is again, an experience.

Colin just couldn’t resist of going to Barstow again (for the factory outlet).  His wife wanted something from Esprit and well, that is truly understandable.  When I was having a girlfriend, and I know how it feels.  The outlet closed at eight and he didn’t have time to shop in Tommy Hilfiger . Actually, we just missed it and he was pissed off with the shop assistance.  That guy should have let us in.

Tomorrow is the last day of holiday and for Colin, he will go back to Singapore, back to Gateway and most happily, go back to his wife.  Good for him.  For me, I will go back to Paris and face all the SIRs again.  Not a very pretty scene but then again, it is not quite the reality.  Think about all the good life I will have (for another three weeks).

The real reality comes when I return to Singapore.  I have this feeling that I am giving all the world can offer and suddenly, I am stripped down to nothing.  Where will I go after this SocGen project?  I have no idea.  Shall I stay in Singapore for a while and do a local project or shall I opt myself going for an overseas project?  Or will I ever have a chance to get back with JP again?  Or it is really not a good idea?

I don’t know.  How I wish I have more control on my future.  Maybe it is time for me to start thinking about my future.  My future?  Can’t believe I don’t even have one, holding the degree I have.

I see lovers all around me.  And I miss the great time I had with JP whenever we were having a holiday.  So magical.  Sad to say, our relationship went downhill.  Even if she gets back to me, it will not be the same anymore.  Not anymore. So why should I think about her from time to time?

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Diary From the Attic Travel Blog

Los Angeles Disneyland … Disneyland Paris Is Better, No?

Amazing that I have been writing diary for four months.  I shall keep it up.

Disneyland at Los Angeles. I was hoping that it will be better than the one in Paris but both me and Colin agrees that the former Eurodisney (now called Disneyland Paris) is far better.  The Sleeping Beauty Castle is so much smaller; even the trees seem to be bigger.  Anyway, this is the original Disneyland.  The biggest one is in Florida.

Okay, we started off in Adventureland.  The Jungle Cruise was just a laugh.  Everything (elephants and crocodiles and hippos) are so fake.  According to the guide, it was built somewhat forty odd years ago.  The next one was pretty good.  It was the Indiana Jones Adventure.  The ride was quite exciting.  I loved the last part where a giant ball was rolling towards us and we suddenly dropped.  By the way, we were riding in a jeep.

Splash Mountain was very much like the one in any theme park.  Riding on the water in a log.  The final drop and … splash … everyone got wet.

The Big Thunder Mountain Railroad is definitely not as good as the one in Disneyland Paris.  The one in Paris, we have two trains going head-on-head with each other.  This one is quite primitive.

As for the Matterhorn Bobsleds in Fantasyland, it is pretty good.  A lot of spinning.  Don’t remember riding it in Paris.

The next one worth mentioning is the Space Mountain.  Very fast speed roller coaster.  But Colin told me that the one in Paris is far better.  Well …

All in all, we were kind of disappointed but it is an experience.  We didn’t take a lot of photos (indeed less than 5) and we left around three.

I just couldn’t help but thinking about JP from time to time.  The time we had when we were in Eurodisney.  I told Colin that I was hoping to forget about her in this US trip but he admitted that it is kind of hard for I will keep thinking back about the good time we had.  True enough.  True enough.

We got out of Disneyland and headed off to Beverly Hills.  Quit a long ride and we stopped by a tiny Chinese Restaurant and had a meal (at 5!).  The American Born Chinese (ABC) look so different.  Heavy makeup, dyed blond hair and perfect American English.  We parked somewhere in the middle of the Beverly Hills and all the shops are so high class.  Even the women on the street, they all look so gorgeous.  Must be a lot of plastic surgery.

Really tempted to buy the single “You were meant for me” by Jewel and send it to JP.  But as Francis said before, for every action, there must be a purpose.  If I don’t intend to get back to her again, what is the purpose of sending her the single?  The original reason of doing so is to let her know why I feel right now, but on the other hands, what do I get out from this?  Does she really care at all?  Wanted to ask Annie (when I return to Paris) if JP has already got herself a new boyfriend but then again, what’s the use of knowing or not knowing this piece of information?

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Diary From the Attic

Destination Los Angeles

Today we needed to hit Los Angeles therefore we both woke up pretty early.  I set the alarm clock at 6:45 am and I woke up naturally.  More correctly, I woke up by a nightmare.  In my dream, I was in bed with JP. And before we got into real business, she admitted that she had slept with more than a hundred guys while I was away.  I was furious and shouting up to the sky (something like the show ”˜Romeo and Juliet’) and I could feel my whole body felt with rage.  And I woke up with cold swears falling from my forehead.

Must be the songs from ”˜Jewel’.

Guess what. I woke up at 7:20 am instead.  Feeling very tired and we stepped out of the room at around eight.  Had a simple breakfast and hit the road.  I felt a lot better today and Colin and I got along well just like Day One.  Kind of strange that my mood changes so suddenly.

At first Colin decided that he would drive all the way to Barstow and I would take the cue and finished off the trip.  In the end, he got tired after one hour of driving on a very straight road and I took over.  We swapped from time to time and it was fun.

The factory outlet in Barstow was huge.  We both spent a lot of money there.  In the end, we were frightened and tried not to step into any shop.

The inn was very decent indeed and we relaxed quite a fair bit.  Colin was into … erm … movies while I just took a nap.  He was craving for Chinese food so we have decided to go for Chinese.  It took us a long time to get there and the food was no good.  But he still thinks that it is better than cheese and bread (Western food).

During the whole day, I was thinking about JP again.  Thinking about the possibility that we will get back together.  But will I ever even be able to bear the shadow of not being able to know what she has been doing behind me?  After all, we have officially broken up.  And do I really care if she is really flirting and sleeping around?  Guess I shouldn’t.  Thought that the purpose of such a trip is to forget about the past but the past is just too difficult to be forgiven.

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Diary From the Attic

Some Traveling Partners Are Not Meant to Be

Last night, we slept very late and hence, today we woke up very late too.  Got up just before midday and decided to tour around Las Vegas.  Throughout the whole day, there has been some kind of fiction between Colin and me.  Right in the morning, I have decided to go the Wal*Mart and get some water.  I do need to drink some decent water.  I think Colin doesn’t really need to drink any water at all.  And I wanted to drive this morning but he refused.  Hence I was very quiet throughout the whole day.  Towards the end of day, I had a headache.  Not a nice day for me.

Went to Luxor (which I wanted so much to go all the while but Colin just …) and it was just as great as it was on TV (Jay Leno Tonight Show).  The Caesar is great too and there is a very nicely decorated indoor high class shopping area and I bought a pair of jeans in Guess.

I don’t think Colin really listens to what I say.  And he always disagrees with me.  That make me think that being agreeable is very important.  And I didn’t have my decent seven hours of sleep and didn’t feel very good at all.  Being understanding is very important as well.  Not surprisingly, I have been thinking about JP the whole day.  I even took her photo out of my wallet and starred at it.  Now, I can truly (close to) feel how she felt and I welcome that.  I hope I shall keep this in mind and shall not step into the same recurrent mistake once again.  And when I am moody (not enough sleep), I just want to be left alone.  That was exactly how JP treated me but obviously didn’t understand and always blamed her for making the day so bad.  Sometimes, little requests may seems not important but it is very important to the one who raises them.

And one thing that really annoys me is that to Colin, the next day begins exactly after midnight.  Tonight, we were talking about what we had last night and after some deep confusion, he told me that we didn’t eat dinner last night.  It was this morning.  To me, the day ends when I go to sleep.

So much differences. Doubt if we’ll ever get along.

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A Melancholic Departure

Today was Thursday.  The second last day of IBSS.  Basically I feel like the last day because it will just be a wrap up tomorrow (plus only half day).  At this very moment, I feel void.  The feeling of missing is immense.  I mean after tomorrow, I will not (probably) be seeing those guys again.  Kind of a very funny feeling.  IBSS is just too short.  One week is just enough to know somebody but not enough to know them in depth.  Seriously I really want to know them a lot better.

Just stepped out the room this morning, we bumped into Autumn.  What an awesome way to start the day.  Can’t really say I like her perfume at all (still Sophie’s one is the best), but she is very pleasant.  Or maybe just her name.

It took the team four hours to realise that their design was no good.  I must learn how to convince people to accept my design.  More clear and more explanations.

But in the end, it was fun.  Although we stayed until 10 pm, I guess ours will be one of the best.  A lot of laughter.  That makes me wonder when was the last time I really laugh happily.  Lots of hard work but I think I have learnt a great deal in the end.

Made my baggage tags today and couldn’t believe that I have to pay $2.00 for each one of them.

“Sun comes up, sun goes down.  Just when we start to get warm, the moon comes up.
People come, people go . Just when we begin to know each other, we have to part.

A different day, a different phase of life.  What can you say, when you don’t have a choice?”

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A Girl Called Autumn, Continued

Autumn.  Autumn.  Autumn.

What a nice name!  Colin told me that she was with us in the Accent on C/S class and he may as well be right.  Somehow, I vaguely remember such a person.

In the morning, we had a group activity – Traffic Jam Problem.  The problem is six of us lined up in a row while another six (opposite team) lined up facing us.  There is an empty space in the middle and each of us can only move forward one single space or “take over” the one in front if only he/she (the one in front) is not facing in the same direction of us. (And we were the first group to figure out the solution.)

Somehow, Autumn was standing very close in front of me at some point in time.  She took a look at my tie (actually held it there) and told me that she loved this tie a lot.  She virtually loved the Zebra.

We went on for another round and when she was right in front of me, I asked if she was really called Autumn and she replied yes.  I told her that it was a really nice name.

And throughout the day, I have been thinking about her.

The day was a disaster.  I just can’t really get along with that Japanese fellow.  Too much conflict and just don’t want to mention about it right now.

Colin and I went to the beer shop and get the Honey Brown.  Got to say I had this feeling of not being of getting into the bus as our stop is the last one.  True enough, the bus was full.  So we decided to walk back.  Colin told me that it would take half an hour and in the end, we ended up walking for an hour.  Nice experience though.

Eugene did reply my last mail (and cc to Colin).  What he replied was so philosophical and it took us quite a while to figure out (still) what he was trying to say.

Looking forward to tomorrow for I shall see Autumn again.

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A Girl Called Autumn

Second day of IBSS and to issue SIR is just my speciality.  My team-mate (an Irish – Cairan) and me, we just get along.  I mean we speak in the same language.  And the class?  Just a laugh for us.  The only thing we learn is possibly the “Advance AC Methodology (Terminology)”.

One girl called Autumn.  Isn’t that a very nice name?

Saw Derek from time to time but I am not really into making friend with him.  Not the same kind of buddy, I guess.

Went to Charles Town Mall again.  Bought the (hard covered) book – Men are from Mars … Think it’s too late to rekindle the relationship but maybe it’s a good idea to prepare myself for the “next” one.

Been thinking of how many postcards shall I send to SocGen.  Either include everybody or exclude a few (because I don’t know the names).  Really a headache.  Maybe I shall decide on Friday instead.

Pizza and beer at the social centre.  Same thing.  And we dropped by and said hi to Cairan.  That guy is really into blond girls.  And I said: Happy hunting.  And he said: I’ll send you the progress report.

Really wanted to buy the board game “Axis and Allies” but it is (a) nobody to play with me and (b) too bulking to bring back.  And when Colin volunteered to bring back for me, I think it is (c) quite expensive.  Must control my expenses.