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For the Geeks Game Reviews

F1 2012 Video Game – A Brief Review As A Casual Racer And An Avid F1 Fan

Edit (Oct 4, 2012) – Bahrain race added.
Edit (Oct 7, 2012) – Spain race added.
Edit (Oct 9, 2012) – Monaco race added.
Edit (Oct 11, 2012) – Canada race added.
Edit (Oct 13, 2012) – Valencia race added.
Edit (Oct 21, 2012) – Silverstone race added.
Edit (Oct 23, 2012) – Germany race added.
Edit (Oct 25, 2012) – Hungary race added.
Edit (Oct 27, 2012) – Belgium race added.
Edit (Oct 31, 2012) – Italy race added.
Edit (Nov 3, 2012) – Singapore race added.
Edit (Nov 5, 2012) – Japan race added.
Edit (Nov 8, 2012) – Korea race added.
Edit (Nov 10, 2012) – India race added.
Edit (Nov 10, 2012) – Abu Dhabi race added.
Edit (Nov 11, 2012) – United States race added.
Edit (Nov 11, 2012) – Brazil race added. 

Onto its third generation, F1 2012 is a jolly good Formula One simulation game.  I am not a racer.  I am terrible in this type of games.  I have not played the last two installments so I have no bearing on what this year’s edition has done better or worse than previous years.  But as an avid F1 fan who has been watching almost all the races for the last few seasons, I would say that I am delighted by the experience thus far.  You can watch F1 on TV all these years, listen to the commentators, or read the articles online.  Nothing beats experiencing the tracks first hand, at the simulator.  This franchise may not be a perfect simulation yet.  However, it is good enough for me to better appreciate the sport.  The entire experience – or the majority of it – feels authentic from a spectator’s viewpoint.

I have written and rewritten this post for a couple of times.  Without making it sounds too technical (and hence boring), I have chosen a journal style in sharing with you my experience thus far.  It may sound depressing at first.  But there are some happy moments for sharing.

Young Drivers Test

Formula One is at the pinnacle of racing.  The technology involved in this sport is ever evolving.  To introduce F1 to the players who are new to the sport, Codemasters the game developer has set up a series of scenarios in the Young Drivers Test.  KERS, DRS, dry tires, wet tires, racing line, apex, and braking distance – all the essentials to get me started are covered in this mode.  Typically, this mode takes 1/2 to 1 hour to complete.  But I am slow.  I took 2 hours to complete.  It was eyeopening to see how corners are tackled.  I have seen so many F1 maneuvers on TV.  Nothing has prepared me for this.

I graduated with a pass, didn’t score a gold.  Perhaps that has affected my option later in my Career mode.

Quick Race

Because I bought the game over the Singapore GP weekend, the first thing I did was to try out the Singaporean track.  The wonderful thing about Quick Race is that I can pick any car, be any driver, and be on any track.  The default setup of a Quick Race is 3 laps with no pit stop.  That is around 6 minutes of game play.

Quick Race is exhilarating.  I live in the city and I can relate to every inch of the simulated track.  Lap one is the most exciting part of the race, as it is in the real F1.  So many cars jam packed into the first few corners.  Trying to find space without causing an incident is an art.

It is rather easy to win the race with one of the top teams on easy setting.  I managed to win with Red Bull Racing (Webber), Ferrari (Alonso), and McLaren (Button).  I have also tried Lotus (Kimi) and Mercedes (Schumacher).  All the top teams usually start at the front of the grid, between P6 to P11.  To see how realistic the race is, one time I picked a Williams car (Senna).  I started further back, pushed all that I could, and managed a point scoring result.  That was probably the best I could muscle out from that car, in that starting position, with my skill today.

Career – Australia

OK!  I was excited and ready to start the career mode.  I have three teams to choose from: Marussia, HRT, and Caterham.  Since I am in love with anything Spanish, I picked the Hispania Racing Team (HRT).  Using a Cosworth powered engine and as a relatively new F1 team, there is only that much the car can do.  In retrospect, I should have picked Caterham.  At least for the KERS technology.  But I am in for immersion.  I pick with my heart.

Instead of 3 practice sessions like in a real F1 weekend, F1 2012 the game only has 1 session that lasts for 1 hour.  I am new to the game so I took my time getting familiarize with the track.  The Australia track looks straightforward.  It is rather round.  But some of the kinks were giving me headache.  During the practice session, I have caused an accident.  So, I was given a 10 place penalty that could not be erased by a flashback (a feature to rewind time and undo a mistake).  Looking back I could have restarted the practice session.  Since I was among the bottom cars, that wouldn’t have mattered much anyway.  Besides, I am in for game immersion.

On round one qualifying, I couldn’t remember which tires I have used.  But the timing was not impressive.  Just like F1, there is a warm up lap to get the tires up to temperature and the clock starts at the end of the warm up lap.  In my overly enthusiastic state of mind, I was trying to do what real F1 drivers do towards the end of the warm up lap – create a gap from the cars in front.  Unfortunately, I slowed down too much and was given another penalty for illegal blocking.

Whatever.

So I started on P24 – the last car on the grid with a combined grid penalty of 20.  I chose a 25% duration setting so the race has a total of 15 laps.  I started well on option tires, gained 7 positions on lap one thanks to all the in-game assist settings.  My scheduled pit stop was on lap 7.  That is silly because even option tires can last longer than that.  But, rules are rules.  I have to use both sets of tires in one race.

I did not know what happened to the option tires.  But since my lap time was not improving, I dived into the pit 2 laps ahead of schedule and went for the more long lasting prime tires.

I got out of the pit, found myself at the back of the grid, and I struggled to get the tires to optimal temperature.  When the cars in front pitted, I was hoping to gain places but I did not.  I was at 23rd, lapped by the front runners.  To rub salt to the wound, even as I moved out of the racing line when I was blue flagged, I was handed a time penalty for blocking the faster cars.  That was not it.  Car 24 tailgated the train of faster cars, overtook me as I gave way.  I started at P24 and ended up at P24.

Overall, a forgettable race.

Career – Malaysia

For some strange reasons, I love the Malaysian circuit.  The flow is good.  The two long back-to-back straights are fun to drive.  The only thing confusing is the pit entrance.  It is at the end of a hairpin and is barely visible when making a tight left turn after a long straight.  It took me quite some time to get the angle right.

Throughout the practice session and qualifying round, I kept it clean.  I did not want another penalty.  I qualified P19.  Still at the back of the grid but higher than my team’s expectation.  Time to celebrate?

Race day was a frustration, due to a wet weather condition.  I have restarted the race a couple of times with different strategies but that did not matter.  I could blame the game (if indeed it was a bug on tires) or my lousy engineer or perhaps my driving and judgement skill.

It started off dry and I have raced my heart out, gained 10 positions by the end of lap one.  P10 is a point scoring position.  I was doing well until the rain started to fall.  I have tried different tire strategies but nothing seemed to work.  The rain looked pretty heavy but since the rest of the cars were still on prime, I stretched my option tires to as long as I could.  I put on the prime tires on my first overdue pit stop.  By then, the rain was too heavy.  I tried to crawl to the finishing line with the wrong tires but I have lost too many positions.  On the last lap, I dived in and got the wet tires on.  I finished one position down at P20.  A very disappointing weekend.

I wish that my engineer is more intelligent and react better to the climate condition.  I wish that calling for a tire in-game outside of scheduled pit stop does not involve getting my thumb off the steering stick and press a combination of 3 keystrokes using the directional pad.

Career – China

I thought Malaysian track was great, Chinese track is even better.  Some of the connecting apexes need to be attacked with a good precision and the result is a better carry through speed.  Very rewarding to drive.  Also, it has a pretty long straight that enables my Cosworth engine to be maxed at 314 km/h for quite a distance.  I really get this track.  I just love it!

During the practice session, I was given a tire wear R&D objective.  I needed to run 3 laps without exceeding a certain amount of tire wear and within a certain time target.  This was for my team to collect some data so as to reduce tire wear during a race.  There was light rain, I was on intermediate tires, and I nearly made it.  On lap 3, I was blocked by a slow moving car.  Not wanting to incur a penalty by causing a collision, I braked too soon and lost the objective.  As the sky opened up, I tried again with option tires.  Interestingly, the time target has revised accordingly because option tires are much faster than the intermediate tires.  I nailed the R&D objective with no problem this time.

Before the practice session expired, I put on the prime tires.  To my surprise, they worked better than the option tires.  By now, I can only conclude that as the track rubbered in, the lap time drops.  Unfortunately, I had to learn this during the qualifying session.

There was no rain during qualifying session.  I put on my option tires and I was fast.  At least I thought I was.  Before I came in for a refuel, I was outside the relegation zone.  My engineer recommended the option tires.  But I insisted on the prime.  Prime tires took a long time to warm up and the lap time was not fantastic.  I raced till the very end, until I ran out of fuel.  Now, why didn’t my engineer called me into the pit when I was running out of fuel?  No idea.  In my relief, I was not penalized as I crawled back into the pit.  P19 was the best I could qualify with.

On race day, I prayed for a sunny weather.  Codemasters answered my prayer and gave me just that.  The dry race was fantastic.  On start, I lost at least 4 places without KERS technology.  I gained up to P8 from P19 during the first few laps, which was pretty remarkable.  Button and I had some wheel banging moments as we overtook each other.  I even got to use the DRS at the DRS zone a couple of times!  For a few laps in this race, I was within 1 second to the car in front.  That was how close I was to the top teams.

By mid race, I lost a position.  KERS plus DRS were not easy to fight against, especially when I have picked one of the two teams that do not have KERS.  I pitted at the exact lap as planned.  I gained back a position from Webber.  But I made a few mistakes under pressure.  My prime tires were cold.  Vettel just zoomed past me.  I could not hold off from Button and Webber for long either.  It was a nail biting moment sitting on P10 – the last point scoring position.  I defended my position like mad because even 1 point in this championship means a lot to me.  At one point, the car behind tried to use a high fuel combination to catch up on me.  That did not last and as I put in some perfect laps, the gap has widen again.  I was relieved to see a breathing gap only to lose it due to a few mistakes I have made.  That turn 16 right before the pit entrance is my Achilles’ heel.  I still can’t get that right.

I was in tears when I saw the checker flag.  P10.  That is a rather good achievement on a HRT car.  I have scored one point, way beyond the expectation of my team.  More importantly so, I beat my own teammate, again.

Career – Bahrain

With my new found confidence, I was all hyped up for the fourth track of the season – Bahrain.  You know how it is like when you first land on a new track.  Either you feel great and love the flow.  Or you feel bad because you don’t get it.  Bahrain, to me, belongs to the latter.

Some of the kinks are hard to master.  If I miss the apex, I will overshoot at the exit and lose time.  Turn 2 is a good example.  It is a rather high speed corner at 158 km/h.  The worst part of the circuit to me is Turn 5, 6, and 7. At 190 km/h, any mistake on this set of three corners often ends badly.  Leading out of Turn 7 is the slowest corner of the track – Turn 8.  Entering the apex at 253 km/h with an exit speed of 79 km/h.  That corner is sharp and slow.  It is so easy to lose control at Turn 8.  My engineer often tells me that I am doing badly on sector 2.  I am not surprised.

On practice day, I started with prime tires.  My HRT did not do too bad, ended up somewhere at midfield.  On my first pit, I changed to option tires, clocked an impressive +0.081 seconds off Alonso’s first position.  That record stayed through the remaining practice session.  On my second garage refuel visit, I kept the tires.  What people say about option tires is true.  They don’t last.  My timing got worst.  I pitted and changed back to the prime tires, even boosted the fuel composition to rich.  Still no improvement.  I must have lost my concentration somehow.  Nonetheless, P2 for a practice session is a good result.

On qualifying session, my engineer asked me not to push too hard.  Looking at my practice result, he reminded me that I should nail Q1 with no problem.  You know what they say about practice results do not necessarily mean anything?  It is true.  I pushed hard on option tires.  By the fourth lap, I was at the relegation zone.  My fuel tank only allowed me to do one more lap.  I blew it.  On the 6th lap when I should have retired into the garage, I had a good feel that my timing was good (the car was lighter due to low fuel) . I decided not to pit and scored a P16.  I had to crawl back to the garage on second gear because there was little fuel left in the car.  Miraculously, I did not incur a penalty for blocking the traffic . I was careful on my crawling line.

Q2, I put on a new set of option tires.  The best I could do was a P17, which was pretty much the last car in round 2.  It was my first Q2 though, so I was happy.

As for the cloudy race day, the same happened.  On start, without KERS, I lost at least four positions.  Gained them back and more through my aggressive driving style (thanks to all assist setting).  As the race settled, I was sitting at P8, which was a pretty good position.  After my pit stop, I rejoined at P11, gradually worked my way back to P8 as other cars pitted.  At one point, Massa overtook me.  I tried to chase him down but I had made one too many mistakes.  He was two seconds ahead, pulling away from me.  And the car behind was two seconds away, gaining up towards me.  Toro Rosso’s Vergne tried to close up the gap with rich fuel setting.  Four more laps to go and my engineer informed me that if I made another mistake, Vergne would be within the one second DRS zone.  I have used up all my flashbacks.  I checked my fuel tank and it has three extra lap worth of fuel.  So I responded with a rich fuel setup, drove relatively flawless for four long laps.  The two seconds gap between Vergne and I was maintained.  I took the checker flag at P9, earned two championship points.  It was time for celebration!

Career – Spain

The Spain circuit, I just don’t get it.  Fans of this video game franchise are right.  We need three practice sessions to attempt in mastering a F1 track, not one.  I have restarted the 1 hour practice session three times and I still felt inadequate.

While this circuit does not have a straight long enough for my HRT car to attain a maximum speed, it does have a number of 90-degree chicanes.  Turn 9 is quite a monster with a corning speed of 230 km/p and a G-force of 3.57, which of course, in the comfort of my home and in front of my 42″ plasma TV, I don’t get to experience.  Leading up to turn 9 is a down slope 90-degree turn 7 and an up slope turn 8 that follows through.  Turn 3 is also my headache because once I am off the racing line and run wide at the entrance, it is extremely hard to hug the corner and race through it.

Weather forecast said that there would be heavy rain on practice day, sunny on qualifying, and light rain on race day.  I am not Michael Schumacher.  I really am not good at wet weather racing.  Why does the weather forecast always right in F1 2012 video game?

Practice day went from wet to dry and back to wet.  That gave me plenty of opportunities to experiment all four types of tires.  In fact, that helped me on my race day when I have to decide when to pit based on track condition.  The only noteworthy timing I have clocked was on the option tires.  I finished the practice with P13.

Qualifying was a sunny day.  Because I was so used to the slower speed on wet condition, I found the dry track speed rather overwhelming.  Throughout the weekend, the car felt twitchy.  I just did not like the setup of the car at all.  I used up both sets of option tires.  But the best I could get was P19.  Hence, I was relegated.  No Q2 for me.

Race day started with light rain.  I have restarted the game quite a number of times.  I noticed that while the race has to be wet as per the forecast, there were tiny random variances that Codemaster the game developer has introduced into each restart.  Like the choice of tires for the rest of the cars, start up speed, accidents, and etc.  On my first attempt, my engineer recommended the intermediate tires, which in retrospect was the dumbest idea.  I was the only one who ran on intermediate tires.  I was basically a sitting duck when the option tires outperform intermediate tires by 6 seconds per lap.  The rain only came in on lap 3.  That was a dumb choice.  I want to fire my engineer.

On my second attempt, I started on option at P19.  I worked my way up to the front and on lap 2, all the cars dived into the pit for the intermediate tires.  I stayed out one extra lap because the track did not look that bad.  It was a wise decision because after my pit stop, I have gained at least 2 positions.  As the track dried up and with 12 laps to go, I switched to option tires.  Unfortunately, the option tires did not last and I struggled a lot for grip towards the end of the race.  So I restarted the game again.

On my third attempt, I did everything exactly as my second attempt except when I switched back to dry tires, I picked the prime tires.  The problem with prime tires is that while they last, they are not known for speed.  I was P1 on lap 2.  When I rejoined after putting on the intermediate tires, I was at P8.  I should have dived into the pit one lap earlier when the track dried up but I was one lap long (such is the excitement of F1 when decisions like this matters).  I lost 4 positions after I put on the prime tires.  It was a nail biting experience at the pit.  P12 when I rejoined.  I lost 1 more position to Massa at pit exit because of a camera view bug (duh!).  I tried to hold off the cars behind me but they were on option, I was on prime.  Even with rich fuel mix, the prime tires are not competitive.  The good news was that the prime tires felt really right towards the end of the race when I was under immense pressure from the cars behind.  The wearing was low and the grip was perfect.  I finished at P15.  Not a point scoring position but I managed to exceed the expectation of the team.  Most importantly, I outraced my teammate Pedro de la Rosa.

Career – Monaco

If you are still undecided about F1 2012 the video game, trust me, being able to experience the Monaco track makes your money worth.  Cynthia and I have visited Monaco once.  We have driven on the road that is part of the F1 circuit.  What Codemasters the game developer does to the Monaco track is amazing.  So much details.  Such realism.  When I first took my HRT car out of the garage, I gasped.  The city is beautiful.  The track is breathtaking.  No wonder all the F1 drivers love this street circuit.  It is narrow and it commands respect.  The moment you make a slight mistake, you wreck the car onto the walls.  Cutting the chicane too fine?  Your rear wheels get tripped and your car spins to the opposite direction.  Some part of the circuit can be bumpy and it is so easy to lose control of the car.  However, once you master the track with millimeter precision, it is a rewarding drive.  All the turns, all the straights – they are memorable.  I simply adore the Monaco track.

I thought I would suck in a street circuit but surprisingly, I do not.  On the sunny practice day, as usual, I put on the prime tires (yellow – soft) saving the super soft tires for later.  Once the track gets rubbered in, my timing should improve.  I gave it my all on the first few laps and I clocked in an amazing lap time of 1.26.152.  No one could get close to this result.  I tried to best myself but somehow, I had problem with Beau Rivage leading up to Massnet as well as the slowest corner Turn 6 and the Turn 15/16.  Towards the end of the practice session, I put on the option tires (red – super soft).  No improvement even though I felt I have put in a few perfect laps.  Strange.

Does it mean that prime tires works better in Monaco?  No idea.  P1 on the practice session.  1.079 seconds ahead of Massa’s Ferrari.

Qualifying, I have a good feel about this track.  Could I replicate my success?  Q1, I put on the primes, clocked in a rather impressive 1.26.726 but only on P12.  0.507 seconds off the first position.  Maybe the yellow soft tires did not cut it.  I got into the next round nonetheless.

Q2, I went for the options.  When I saw my lap time at 1.25.282 on second lap, I knew my work was done.  So I sat at the garage waiting for the session to be over.  P1, I was at.  First time I would be on round three.

Q3, the rain started.  I put on fresh options like everyone did.  Got out of the garage as fast as possible.  I did a flying lap but the result was not impressive.  I stayed out on options for too long and when I changed for the intermediate tires, the track condition has worsen.  There was no point putting on wet tires because I would not be able to beat others.  So I retired at P7.  What a disappointment.

The scoreboard said that I was at P7.  But when I proceeded to the next stage, the game put me on P10.  I must have violated the time-space continuum a.k.a. PS3 bug.

On race day, I started on the super soft tires.  Rain has started falling from the sky but everyone was on options.  Lap 1, I made some aggressive overtaking on Turn 1, gained up to P6.  Then gained another position along Beau Rivage.  Round Turn 3, I followed the cars in front closely, managed to gain another position at Casino from the outside.  I held onto P4 through Tunnel.  Unfortunately at Chicane, I oversteered and was overtaken.  I lost a position but that was racing.  I was cool with it.  By then, the rain appeared to intensified but the track remained somewhat dry.  All the car in front dived into the pit and changed for intermediate tires.  I have decided to stay out and watched my lap time closely sitting at P1.

Lap 2, there was no significant drop of timing so I thought, perhaps the rain was not that bad.  I pushed onto lap 3 and my engineer told me that the Red Bull behind were pitting for intermediate tires.  I must have gained enough gap due to my tire decision because when I pitted for intermediate tires, I was still on P1.

As the track remained wet, Rosberg behind me was in fuel saving mode.  In retrospect, that was quite a good strategy.  Since the one behind me was not chasing, I was quite relaxed sitting at P1.  By lap 6, the rain has stopped.  Some cars have pitted for dry tires but I have decided to stay out for another 2 laps, again watching my lap time closely.

I was losing 3 seconds for lap 6 and 7 so I thought, now could be the right time for dry tires.  Options or primes?  There are still 13 laps to go.  It could be a challenge to make the super soft option tires last that many laps.  But what if it rained later?

Decision, decision.  I put on the faster option tires on lap 8 with Rosberg still behind my back not wanting to let go.  He switched to rich fuel mix now that he had saved enough fuel during the wet weather racing.  Uh oh.  At first there was a 7 seconds gap.  Then it was cut to 5 seconds.  I put in some flawless laps so as to maintain the gap.  That seemed to work until I met the black markers.

Black markers are the slower cars that let you overtake once you are near.  The challenge is, there aren’t many places on the track whereby you can comfortably overtake a black marker.  Any time spent behind a black marker is a lost in lap time.  Rosberg was closing in while I was patiently waiting for my overtaking opportunities.  Causing a collision incurs time penalty and I surely do not want that, especially in this race.

By lap 16, I started to feel the tire wear effect.  The grip was deteriorating rather dramatically.  I had to lengthen the braking distance and reduce the cornering speed.  Rosberg was only 3 seconds behind me!  I was losing more lap time than what Rosberg has gained.  So I thought, perhaps he was struggling with tire wear as well.

True enough, by lap 18, Rosberg trailed behind and was overtaken by Alonso who was on prime tires!  This time, Alonso was after me, potentially with better tires, maybe 2 laps older than mine.  2 more laps to go and my tires were in lousy condition.  There was no grip.  I had to put in a lot of focus and drove conservatively . I slowed down quite a bit so as to nurse the car to the finishing line.

I was in tear when I took the checker flag at P1.  At that very moment, I was mentally and physically exhausted.  A maximum of 25 championship points for the team and for me.  Alonso was P2, Rosberg P3.

Career – Canada

Life of a F1 driver as such.  Hero in one race, zero in another.  And people’s memory is as good as the last circuit you raced.

One look at the Canada circuit and I knew that my HRT would not be able to make it.  The track is wide, lots of straights, plenty of overtaking opportunity.  With no KERS and a humble Cosworth engine, I would be a sitting duck.

My guess was spot on.

It was yet another wet weekend.  Started the practice session on prime, then into intermediate and wet.  I struggled tremendously for pace.  Best timing was 1.23.231 at P7, which is 0.408 second off Kobayashi’s option tires.

Turn 13/14 continues to be my pain point.  At a maximum speed in excess of 300 km/h, the turns are sharp with a carry through speed of 135 km/h.  A tiny mistake my car would hit the white chicane and smash onto the wall at exit.  So hard to get that right.

Q1, P15 on intermediate.  That was the best I could squeeze out of the car.  Q2, P17 on option.  And I began to think that for this track, option is just not as good as prime.

On race day, first 4 laps on intermediate then the remaining 14 laps on prime.  Gained some positions on lap 1 but I slipped from P13 to P16 driving defensively most of the time.  The infamous Maldonado hit my car at Turn 13/14.  Even with 10 seconds penalty, he was still ahead of me.

How in the world did I lose 13 seconds over 2 laps?  That collision must have caused me much time.  Tire wear too.  In a real F1 race, causing an accident would have been handed with a drive-through penalty, which translates to 20+ seconds.

Ah, whatever.  Time to look forward to the next race.

Career – Europe (Valencia)

Valencia is a street circuit.  I knew I would do good in this one.  What a pity that we will not be seeing this track in the next year’s Formula One calendar.

Now, before we get to the race, let’s talk about my favorite topic: practice day.

Some of you may wonder, what is the fun in practice day when the results do not matter?  To me, I enjoy the 1 hour practice session because I get to compete against myself.

In this simulation, practice day consists of three stints.  Since prime tires last longer than options, I would reserve the option tires to the last stint when the track is rubbered in.

In each stint, my team puts in a fuel load of 10 laps.  Minus off the warm-up lap and out lap (pit entrance is before start-finish line hence out lap has no lap time record), depending on track length, there can be over 20 race laps in one practice session.

Lap time is recorded at the end of each of the three sectors.  When you better your best sector time, the timing is indicated in green, just like what you see on TV.  When you set the fastest sector or lap time among others, it is indicated in purple.  Otherwise, in red.  As you can imagine, every 40 seconds or so, I would take my eyes off the track and observe my sector and lap performance.

First stint is always better than second stint.  Because as tires are wearing off, the lap time lengthen.  The lap-by-lap comparison between the first two stints often gives me a good indicator on how tire wear works for a particular track (because fuel load is held constant).

At the beginning of each stint, the car is heavier due to high fuel load.  Towards the end of each stint, tire wear effect kicks in.  So the break even point is somewhere in the middle, when tire and brake temperature is at the optimal.

Of course, when done right, there is a good chance that the third stint sets the best personal record.  Again, that depends on the track layout.

Practice day is also one way to judge how competitive my car is with respect to the rest.  In Valencia, I clocked in a lap time of 1.53.795 on option tires. 0.598 second ahead of Vettel.  That is a pretty good result.

I love racing in Valencia (Spain).  There is no sudden change of direction.  I have sufficient time to slowly inch toward the wall.  Smooth driving is the key.  The last few sequences before the start-finish line is breathtaking, flowing through the turns at 295 km/h.  What I love about this track is that putting in a perfect lap is very doable.  And it does not require too high a concentration.

First round of qualifying, I scored a P1 with 1.53.341 on primes.  Maldonado was merely 0.049 second behind me, not sure what tires he used.  Q2, Alonso qualified 0.153 second ahead of my P4 result at 1.52.684 on options.  I did not have much hope for Q3 because I don’t usually qualify well.  When I saw my lap time of 1.52.074, I knew I nailed it.  Alonso was 0.199 second behind me.

So, first time in my F1 video gaming career, I was the pole sitter.  I did not have high hope on race day because without KERS, there is no way to have a good start.  I tried my best to block Alonso on start but Hamilton and Alonso shot pass me before Turn 1, one on each side.  Through the initial slow sequence, I followed the two cars closely but I did not manage to overtake Alonso until the second lap.  By then, Hamilton was well ahead and I have Alonso on my back.  With DRS enabled, it was nerve wrecking trying to drive defensively and at the same time, stay on the racing line.  That was quite impossible.

Then the rain came.  The official disabled DRS.  That got Alonso off my back.  My engineer asked me to pit in on lap 6 but again, with the changing weather condition, there was no point in making too many pit exits.

Because of the pit stop reshuffling, I was momentarily on P1.  Unfortunately I stayed out too long and the rain was getting too heavy.  I did not know how Hamilton did it but he managed to overtake me on dry tires.  I dived into the pit at the end of lap 8, switched to intermediate tires, and continued the race.

At one point, Webber tried to go full red and overtake me.  I responded with full red and drove as perfectly as I could.  At the end of lap 14, the track was too wet so I put on the wet tires.  Hamilton was 13 seconds ahead of me and Button was 3 seconds behind me.  Button managed to close the gap down to 1.7 seconds but I responded.  Hamilton was too far gone and my target was to bring home a P2.  Last couple of laps I put in some good timing.  I took the checker flag 3 seconds ahead of Button.

With all considered, P2 is a good result.  I am happy to bring home 18 championship points, for my HRT team and for me.

Career – Great Britain (Silverstone)

What a frustrating ‘weekend’.  Except this in-game weekend has lasted more than a week in real life.  I have tried hard.  I just cannot get the Silverstone track right.  Sector 1 involves a set of odd shaped slow corners.  Sector 1 is also consistently my worst performing sector throughout the ‘weekend’.  I could lose up to a second in sector 1.  What gives?

While my sector 1 performance is consistently bad, sector 2 ranges from spectacularly good to spectacularly disastrous.  Maggots and Becketts are tough.  These are high speed chicanes.  If I turn slightly too early or too late, the error would get accumulated through the turns and my car would overshot into the grass.

Sector 3 is my best sector.  It is rather straightforward except the sharp chicane Stowe.  I realize that so long as I go a bit easier on the gas petal as I exit the corner, it is possible to stay on the racing line.

Onto the 9th race of the in-game season 1, my standing is at 9th in the championship.  I do not quite understand how the AI in this game works.  After repeated the 1 hour practice session not less than 3 times, I managed to clock a best lap time of 1.44.461.  I was at P2 just 0.064 seconds behind Kimi.

So I thought I have finally nailed this track.  Q1 I clocked a 1.44.474 on option – very similar to my practice day result – but was at P16.  1.271 seconds off the pace of the leader.  Where did the AI cars find the sudden improvement?

In Q2, I pushed for another improvement at 1.44.031.  That only put me at P14 with a even larger gap of 1.863 seconds off P1.  Needless to say, I could not move into Q1.  More importantly, it was a shocking revelation on how bad the HRT car is and / or how bad my driving skill is.

I took a break from the career mode and headed over to quick race mode.  Same track but with a Lotus Renault.  I had no problem in winning while clocking a lap time of 1.40-ish.

Ah, whatever.  It is not like I can drive a Lotus any time soon.  My best memory of this game has to be stuck behind one of the worst, if not the worst car of the game.

On race day, starting at P16, I dropped below P20 at first corner.  But that was not news to me.  I fought hard for position and managed a P10 on prime.  Alonso was again behind me.  The problem with defensive driving is that I lose lap time against those who would have pitted and raced on a different part of the track.  I held Alonso off till he pitted.  Then I lost a position to Vergne of Toro Rosso but managed to regain it back.  Kobayashi was behind me and I fought him off too.  I was at P8 when I pitted.  But only rejoined at P12.  At pit exit, I lost track positions to 3 cars that sped pass me.  My tires were cold and I could not defend against Vergne.  So I dropped to P16.

Gosh.  I hate Vergne.  He is there to have a last laugh at me in every other race.

Once the option tires got up to temperature, the last 5 laps was rather uneventful.  I was not able to chase after the cars in front.  The cars behind were not able to catch up on me.  Quite possibly the most enjoyable stint of the race.

P16, no championship point.  Ironically, my team boss is happy with my progress.  And I am officially on equal status with my teammate Pedro de la Rosa who was the 1st driver of HRT.

Career – Germany

What a tiring but delightful race ‘weekend’.  Germany GP was the 10th race in the calendar, the halfway point of the season.  I have made a few discoveries on this game that are worth sharing.

First, is the Young Drivers Test.  When I started this game, I did not pay much attention to the test.  I have passed the test, good enough to obtain my super license and race.  Now that I am more comfortable with the game mechanic, I have attempted to complete all my objectives and managed to score a silver medal in the final evaluation.  Instead of 3 car teams for my picking, if I was to restart my F1 career today, I would have 5 teams to choose from.  That would, I guess, include Toro Rosso and Williams on top of the bottom 3 cars.

Now, why didn’t I do that?

Second, let’s talk about objectives.  The only way to gain XP and ranks is by meeting objectives.  It can be a frustrating business because the targets appear to be rather random.  They change every weekend.  I may be wrong.  But the qualifying objective seems to be an average between my current standing and my last race result.  Going into Germany GP, my standing was P10 and my last race was P16.  My qualifying target was P13.  Race day target appears to be one position above your qualifying result.

Because each track is different, I am finding it hard to be consistent in the progress.  This rule rewards graduate improvement over the season.  Not erratic results like mine.  Some weekends I would miss out on both objectives, even when I got into a point scoring position.  Most weekends I only got one.  This is certainly an aspect of the game I wish to see improvement come next year.

Third, I have finally nailed down on the reason why in some sectors I may lose up to 1 second in terms of lap time.  Turn 3 and 4 prior to Parabolika look rather harmless.  But through the heavy grilling of qualifying rounds as I was hell-bent in beating the target, I realize that because I am on the auto-gearbox mode, the gear shifting can be very sensitive to track condition.  Depending on the corning speed, a sharp steering may result in a gear down-shift or a delayed up-shift that affects the exit speed.  Those two turns alone may eat up 1 second of my sector time between my best and worst.  Sticking to race line does not seem to yield a desirable result.  I have to really ‘feel’ the car by listening to the engine while turning.

Now, back to the race weekend, Germany GP is a beautiful track.  Parabolika – quite possible the fastest and longest turn in F1 – is breathtaking.  It is a very memorable turn in my F1 career too as you will read later.  At the end of Parabolika is the 59 km/h Hairpin.  Sector 3 consists of 6 fast paced turns.  Also, from a driver’s point of view, the line-up of the colorful grandstands along these turns is an unusual eye candy.  As for the rest of the track, it is mostly trees on one side, buildings on the other.

I have struggled a lot on this track with my HRT.  Practice session saw changing weather condition.  I have used 4 different types of tires, tried for days.  My best time was 1.26.163, +0.946 second off Kimi.  That put me to P16.

It was a sunny day for qualifying rounds.  Initially, I could not even get through to Q1.  How to beat my P14 objective?  In the end, I tried mix-3 fuel setting on option tires, managed to score a P16 at 1.24.992 (+0.515 second off Maldonado).  The problem with mix-3 fuel setting is that my fuel burns fast.  It is enough for 1 warm-up lap, 2 good laps, maybe 1 more lap before the out lap on lean fuel setting.  My rhythm would be if the third race lap timing does not look good, I would return to my garage, refuel, maybe have the tires changed, and then retry.  Tires take at least 2 laps to get to an optimal temperature.  As you can see, my window of opportunity is narrow.

Through persistence, I nailed Q2 at P13 with a lap time of 1.24.573 (+0.749 second off Button).  I could not get through to Q3.  But I am happy.  Because I beat the P14 target.

Race day is yet another dry race (hooray!) and I started on option tires.  I raced my heart out looking for gaps in the opening lap.  I pushed up to P10 and I was first hassled by Schumacher.  After a few laps, he must have overtaken by Kimi.  It was tough to fight off Kimi.  At the long straight off turn 1, I lost a position to him.  I desperately regained it back at turn 3 by braking from the inside.  It was a bad decision because in order to avoid a collision, Kimi and I have slowed down so much so that the cars behind must have caught up on us.  Two cars attempted to overtake me at the Parabolika DRS zone from either sides.  I quickly looked behind and have decided to let Kimi pass while blocking Schumacher.  My target was P12 so P11 was acceptable.  Kimi is lethal.  Schumacher is not.

Lap 8, I dived in for a tire change.  I got back out on track at P16 thinking that my race was over.  Then the cars in front went in for their routine pit stops and I was back to P11.  Now, I have Massa on my back.  I switched to mix-3 fuel setting and have to watch closely on the gap between Massa and I as well as my fuel tank.  When the gap was less than a second, I have to prepare for the worse at the DRS zone.  Massa and I battled each other all the way to the last few laps when one of my late braking must have cost him dearly.  Because guess what?  My all-time-rival Vergne of Toro Rosso was right behind me!  He who from time to time always try to ruin almost all my races.

Lap 16 of 17, I was not about to lose to Vergne without a fight.  At Parabolika, I quickly closed up the inside so he has to attempt overtaking me from the outside.  I blocked him once and he went further out.  Parabolika while appears as straight is still a turn.  He lost control of the car and the yellow flag was out.  Bye bye Vergne.  Oh, how I love Parabolika.  His teammate Ricciardo was 2 seconds behind me.

2 seconds was a good gap.  I drove as flawless as I could.  Observing that I still have excess fuel, I switched back to mix-3 setting.  I took the checker flag at P11.  Objective met.  It was Hamilton on P1, Ricciardo on P12, Massa on P14, and Vergne on P17 (ha!).

To top up my double objectives met this race weekend, Toro Rosso has offered me a contract!  By taking up this contract, I will not be able to enter into any contract negotiation for the next season.  I am frustrated with my HRT car.  Without KERS is a serious handicap.  The current world champion Sebastian Vettel has driven a Toro Rosso before.  Besides, I get to unseat Vergne.

I took the contract in a heartbeat.

Bye bye Vergne.

Career – Hungary

The Hungarian Grand Prix is going to be the highlight of my F1 gaming career.

I enjoy role playing.  Hence in whichever game I play, I try to role play as much as I can.  Same for F1 2012 the video game.

With this new contract, I am now racing for Scuderia Toro Rosso (STR).  Do I miss HRT?  Of course I do.  The beautiful white and gold livery.  The good old comfort zone.  Now, I have to prove myself again, with a new teammate.  If I still cannot win more races, that could mean that it is indeed the driver’s problem, not the car.

The Hungarian circuit is rather short.  But it is full of action.  The curves are pretty evenly distributed and are rather sharp.  On practice day, it rained.  I thought the rain was pretty bad but I went out with the prime dry tires.  Whoa, the road was slippery!

I then took my engineer’s advise, put on the intermediate tires.  It was even worse.  How could it be?  OK, the ground did not look that wet.  I tried the wet tires and it was impossible to drive.

So, it was dry tires on a rainy day with part of the circuit rather dry and part of the circuit rather wet.  Oh boy.  Was that the localized weather condition?

I have raced wet weather on dry tires in a HRT car before.  Toro Rosso – based in Italy and equipped with a Ferrari 056 engine – surely feels more agile, and the car comes with KERS.  But it is also harder to handle compared to HRT.  If I am going too fast into a corner or accelerate too fast out of a corner, the car will spin.  How fast is too fast?  It is hard to tell, especially with localized weather condition.

Through persistence and practice, I discover that the track after the L-shaped turn 9 all the way to the start-finish line can be very wet.  I also discover that the dry track is not easy to driver either.  I often overshot or lose control of the car at turn 2 and turn 6.  The pressure was indeed mounting!

To my surprise, I clocked a best lap time of 1.29.952 during practice session.  That is 1.079 seconds ahead of Vettel on 2nd place.  Maybe I have it in me?

Q1, the condition was somewhat like the practice session.  I intended to save the option tires for later rounds.  And with my practice result, I did not think I would have problem qualifying above P17.

From a career perspective, KERS was a new technology for me.  I have to strategically deploy the 6.6 seconds boost along the circuit.  I choose to pour in half of the KERS allowance on the start-finish straight so as to gain the top speed – the only place in this circuit where I can – as fast as possible.  And I need to watch out for the rev limiter because there is no point in burning KERS when my car cannot go any faster.  The long straight after turn 3 is also my favorite spot to burn 2 seconds of KERS.  The remaining 1-ish second I deploy at the exit of 14 so as to achieve a better carry through speed to the start-finish line when the KERS timer gets reset.  That helps my goal in gaining top speed as soon as possible.

Back to Q1, in my first attempt I got a P3 so I was happy.  Then we have a power trip at home and I have to do it all over again.  On my second attempt, I put in one hot lap.  When I saw 1.29.169, I knew I nailed it.  For the remaining session, I sat at the garage watching the live timing.  My engineer asked me to try again but I doubted anyone would beat my timing.  So I waited at the garage till Q1 expired.  P1.  1.02 seconds gap with Maldonado.

Q2, it was heavy rain.  I have not practiced on wet tires and not sure how I would compare among others.  I was at the bottom on first attempt.  OK, I needed to push harder.  And I did.  Laps after laps I pushed harder and harder till I lost control of the car.  I did a 1.38.279 and was surprised that again, I was at P1.  0.231 second ahead of Hamilton.

Q3, the rain was even heavier.  Wow.  The road was really slippery!  Was it even safe to drive?  Q3 is a very short session.  You have one shot and have to make it count.  I lost control of the car during warm up lap and was concern about the track condition.  I did not push too hard and did a best lap time of 1.39.106 that I was unable to improve.  I was prepared to restart Q3 when I saw my name staying at the top of the list till the session expired.  0.22 second ahead of Alonso.  How did I do that?

I was on pole!

Race day was sunny.  I have not driven a Toro Rosso on a dry track.  I have not practiced the Hungarian track on a dry condition.  It was time to improvise.  Perhaps continue trying for the rest of the week?

First time in my racing career I have KERS to defend my position.  I was on pole in Valencia and was unable to convert that into a win.  Now, there was nothing to blame but me.

Starting on pole is breathtaking.  You look ahead and you see an open track.  No car in front of you.  Once the five lights were out, I accelerated fast, slowly moving over to Alonso’s P2 direction while burning half of my KERS.

Onto turn 1, I was still in the lead.  I tried to be cautious when exiting the turn and unfortunately I was a tad too slow.  Alonso sped pass me at the exit.  I don’t normally use KERS at that stretch but it was now or never in order to regain my position.  By turn 3, I overtook Alonso while Hamilton followed my race line and gained a position against Alonso as well.  It was now between Hamilton and I and I burned the remaining KERS allowance right after I exited turn 3.  I did not know what Hamilton has.  Now it was the time to put in all that I have learned and drive as flawless as I could.  So long as I could pull a 1 second gap by the end of lap 2, before DRS was enabled, I should be fine.

By the time DRS was enabled, Hamilton was 2.8 seconds behind me.  It was an exhilarating experience leading a race with a healthy gap.  I needed to pit for my prime tires at lap 8 and by then, I was close to 8 seconds ahead of Hamilton.

Woohoo!

I was happy a bit too early.  Because by the time I exited the pit, I dropped to P9.  Ouch.  That was painful.  The car in front was on option and my engineer told me that I had no hope in catching him.  I turned my fuel to mix-3, managed to defy my engineer’s prediction and overtook a few cars.  All of a sudden, I was on P1 as the cars in front pitted.

It was not the time to lose concentration because the cars behind me should be on option tires.  Hamilton managed to close the gap slightly on fresh and faster tires.  But I was able to pull away as my prime tires got into optimal condition.  On lap 16 of 18, I have more than 12 seconds gap with Hamilton.  My engineer radioed in and informed me that I did not need to push too hard, just bring home the car.

The race ended after 27 minutes and 46.794 second.  Hamilton was on P2, 12.093 seconds behind me.  Alonso was on P3 with a 15.994 seconds gap.  I took P1 on race day, on all three qualifying rounds, and on practice session, in my first race for Toro Rosso.

I am a happy man.  I am not sure if I will do well on a fast track.  We shall see.  For now, it is time to celebrate!

Career – Belgium

With my new found confidence from the Hungarian race, I was keen to start on Spa, the famous Belgium race.

Spa is best to experience on track.  Eau Rouge is famous for a good reason.  The turn is on an elevated ground.  Attacking Eau Rouge at a high speed and on qualifying rounds with the DRS wing opened, I need to exercise extreme caution running up the hill.  Because it is hard to see where the track is heading until I hit the top.  Sector 2 is pretty technical in nature.  Misjudging the cornering speed often lands my car onto the gravel or grass.  The flow of sector 3 is good.  With gentle steering, it is possible to open the DRS wing on the downhill sequence.  Breathtaking.

I was concerned about how the PS3 patch 1.2 (equivalent to 9 PC patches) would change the difficulty of the game.  On practice, I clocked a 1.59.593 on prime.  I could not get a better result on option.  P1. 1.38 seconds faster than Webber’s P2,

OK.  That is a positive result.  Q1 I put on the prime tires and did a 1.58.591 on first lap.  That was a 1 second improvement over my practice session so I sat at the garage waiting for Q1 to be over.  Vettel took P1, 0.445 second faster than my P5 lap time.  Not a problem.  I am still through to round 2.

Q2, I chose option tires and did a 1.57.297.  My goal was to get into top 10 and that was a pretty good result.  And I was on P1.

Q3, I was unable to match my Q2 result and only managed a 1.57.652.  But that was still 1.077 seconds faster than Alonso’s P2.

So I was on pole again!

I enjoyed a dry weekend.  This new patch has indeed fixed the frequency of wet races.  Unlike the Hungarian race, I did not give Alonso a chance to overtake me at the exit of turn 1, although he tried.  Burning half of my KERS running up to Eau Rouge, the car felt so slow!  The high fuel load was killing me.

Keeping it neat and tidy, I spent the rest of the KERS on Kemmel Straight.  From this point onward, it is about opening gaps with the cars behind.

Spa is a rather long circuit.  So at 25% race duration, I only needed to complete 11 laps.  Lap 5, I pitted for the prime tires and rejoined the race at P5.  I did not panic this time because the cars in front would need to pit eventually.

It wasn’t a perfect race.  At one point, Alonso was 2.8 seconds behind me.  I wasn’t opening as much the gap as I wished for.  I regained my concentration and pushed for a tidier run.

The race ended after 22 minutes 37.948 seconds.  I took the checker flag at P1.  My best lap time of the race was 2.00.363.  Alonso was on P2 (+5.567 seconds) and Hamilton was on P3 (+6.618 seconds).

25 championship points for Toro Rosso.  Not bad for a number 2 driver.

Career – Italy

Monza is the fastest circuit (I think) in the F1 calendar.  Historically speaking, I do well on slow tracks, terribly bad on fast tracks.  Critical to my F1 career, I have to get this circuit right (as you will read later).  My mind is fixed on winning this track, and the six races thereafter.  I would do whatever it takes to achieve me goal.

Whatever.  It.  Takes.

I have practiced this track on the Time Trial mode for no less than 200 laps.  In one particular setting, I went round and round in circle for ONE HUNDRED laps trying to beat my best time.  Each lap takes about a minute and a half and you can do the maths.  Oh yes, I am committed.

Onto the 13th race of the season, I can pick a rival to go against.  If I am able to beat him in 7 races, I will get to steal his seat and join his team on the 20th race at Brazil.  The stake is high.  To help you understand my dilemma, here was the scoreboard prior my racing in Monza.

  1. Hamilton
  2. Alonso
  3. Webber
  4. Grosjean
  5. Me
  6. Button
  7. Schumacher
  8. Rosberg
  9. Raikkonen
  10. Massa

I was rooted for a Ferrari car.  Unfortunately Alonso was too high and Massa was too low.  I only allowed to pick one of the two up’s or two down’s.  Ugh.  I would want a black Lotus.  But Grosjean has been doing pretty good in this season and Lotus is a tier-2 car (same as Mercedes).  Since I have to work hard for this, why not shoot for a tier-1 car?

So I picked Button as my rival.

Monster Monza only has 11 turns.  One friend of mine said that it is a beginner’s track.  I have to disagree with all my heart.  Monza is a monster.  Let’s break it down.

Turn 1 and 2 are the slowest chicanes of the entire track.  Approaching them at top speed, you really have to be very gentle in flowing through the chicanes.  I often think of feathers while caressing Turn 1 and 2.  These chicanes can cost me 1 second or more if I am not gentle.  Getting them right is what the first sector is about.  Turn 3 is OK so long as I am wide awake (after 100 laps, I can’t say).  It is easy to touch the grass on the left and the gravel on the right when I am trying to use too much space.

Turn 4 and 5 are nasty.  Cutting the chicanes too deep and my car would land onto the gravel to the left.  Going too gentle and I would lose too much speed.  The real excitement comes from Turn 6 and 7.  These are fast 90-degree corners.  A misjudge in the corning speed would again land my car onto the gravel.  The penalty is brutal.

Turn 8, 9, 10 are somewhat like Turn 4 and 5, but with a much faster speed.  I have discovered that so long as I cut deep into Turn 8 and be gentle with the throttle, Turn 9 and 10 do flow through rather nicely.  Otherwise, my car would slow down at a snail pace exiting Turn 9 due to a lack of space.

Then, there is another long straight leading to the final turn, Curva Parabolica.  It is easy to lose time here too when not attacked at the right speed and angle.  But when done right, accelerating through this turn is breathtaking.

Out of my 200 odd practice laps, a vast majority ended bad.  My main problem with Monza is consistency.  I was concerned before the race weekend.  Getting a good lap time in Monza – to me – has little to do with tire choice or fuel load.  It has everything to do with one thing: Am I keeping it clean and tidy?

I have no idea how I am doing compared to the AI cars.  On practice session, I was on P1 with a lap time of 1.28.646.  That was +2.215 seconds faster than Grosjean, one of the biggest gaps I have seen this season.  Does this mean that my hard work has paid off?

True enough, once qualifying rounds have started, some car teams have suddenly found dramatic improvement.  Q1, I was on P1 with a 1.28.823 on prime.  Hamilton was merely 0.662 second behind me.  My advantage has been chipped away!  Q2, I switched to option and pushed hard.  Again, P1 and this time with a 1.28.213.  That was 1.161 seconds faster than Vettel.  Phew.  Q3, I pushed harder and did a 1.27.679.  I should be happy with the result.  Unfortunately, Button my rival was right behind me with a 0.712 second gap.  How did he find the pace and even beat his teammate Hamilton?  I must have motivated him somehow.

On race day, I was on pole and was weary of McLaren’s pace.  I may be winning these days, but Hamilton is still on top of the scoreboard.  I have to win Button in Monza and he was on P2.  This was going to be an epic battle, a worthy battle.

5 lights went out and I charged to the first chicane with my mighty Toro Rosso.  I contemplated if I should use KERS on the first long straight as my starting position put me right on the racing line.  There is no way for Button to attack the first chicane from the inside.

But I used a bit of KERS just in case.

I gained a good gap on sector 1 but I did not do too well on sector 2.  Onto sector 3, Button was merely 0.7 second behind me threatening to overtake me on the final long straight.  I knew this day would come so I used my remaining KERS to defend my position.

Once my tires got to optimal temperature, it was all about keeping it neat and tidy and open enough gap from the cars behind.  By the time DRS zone was enabled, I have a 2+ seconds gap from Button.  So I was comfortable.  After a few laps, the gap went as high as 5 seconds but it dropped to 3 seconds as I was not too perfect in my execution.  I was concerned but I did not want to push too hard and land onto the gravel.

Button must have pitted early because all of a sudden, I have Vettel 7+ seconds behind my back.  I wished my engineer could tell me how Button was doing with his new tires.  Was he gaining lap time against me?  Should I pit early in order to cover my position?  Talk to me boss!

By the time I pitted for the prime tires and rejoined the track, I was at P10.  I dialed the fuel mix to 3 and overtook one car in front that was on option.  2 laps later when all the front runners made their schedule pit stops, I was back in P1 with Hamilton behind me.

What happened to Button?  Maybe AI cars do not cheat after all.

The gap with Hamilton was comfortable so I did not need to push too hard.  To my utter surprise, I was able to keep to the track on the entire race of 13 laps, without even the need for a flashback (a time rewind to correct mistakes).  Driving a Toro Rosso definitely feels different from, say, a HRT or a Caterham.  The car just does not turn when I want it to.  I have to come off the throttle early, feel the gear’s downshift, and gently apply gas.

The real excitement was at the last lap, I heard thunder rolling from the outside.  Lightning is known to cut off my Internet connection and at time, cause power trip.  I was praying hard that my PS3 would not get turned off before my progress was saved.

Woot!  I took the checker flag at P1.  A total race time of 20 minutes 23.200 seconds (best lap time was 1.30.771).  Hamilton was 12.743 seconds behind me and Rosberg took the last podium position.

Most importantly, Button was at P5.

Career – Singapore

I am a Singaporean.  So this track has a special place to my heart.  Indeed, this circuit has so many turns that some sequences would make me dizzy.  It is a challenging track.  There are walls everywhere, like in Monaco.  But the streets are not as narrow as Monaco’s.  Because there are so many chicanes, it is rather easy to cut too deep and trip on one of them.  F1 drivers dislike Turn 10, the Singapore Sling.  I agree wholeheartedly.  In my mind, it is one of the few death traps.  I could glide through it.  Most of the time I am OK.  But when I am not, the car ends up bad.  I hate leaving things to luck.

Another death trap is Turn 9.  Carry too much speed and my car would smash right onto the barrier.  It is hard to judge most of the time and when I discover that there is not enough space, very often it is too late.

I like sector 3.  These are new roads made for racing.  The flow through Turn 22 and 23 is excellent.

Now, because I live in the city and have driven on these roads in real life, I find it rather easy to memorize the turns.  I can understand why Singaporean circuit is one of the least favorite tracks in game.  So many walls, so many turns.  For me though, I love the graphical representation of the track.  One time, I slowed the car to 40 kph so that my family could marvel at the buildings and the trees, the marina and the road markings.

Like the Monza track, I practiced this one hard on Time Trial mode.  Time Trial is an excellent way to identify problem areas and to better yourself.  Fuel load, tire wear, engine and tire temperature are taken out of the equation.  On the road, there are only two cars.  Yours and a ghost car that represents your personal best.  You can shoot through a ghost car.  No overtaking is required.  By observing the sector-by-sector timing comparison as well as when the overtaking takes place, you know where you can push harder and where you should keep it tidy.

Back to the race weekend, the AI cars seem a bit weak.  Maybe I have come well prepared.  The gap on practice session between my car and the car behind was be as high as 8.477 seconds.  And guess who was on P2?  My rival, Button.

I suppose for a track like Singapore, Codemasters the game developer has to take into consideration that there is a wider variant in terms of individual player’s performance.  Hence the weaker AI cars.  Or perhaps Codemasters intends for us to love the track a little bit more.

On practice, I did a 1.50.290.  The main problem I face was extreme tire wear.  Perhaps I pushed the car too hard and that was a concern.  Prime tires usually last for 2 stints but I had to pit in earlier than usual and put on the option tires.  The option tires were even worse.  Once the Pirelli tires expire – like in real life – the tire performance falls off the cliff.  There is no grip or whatsoever.

Being confident that I would qualify well, I put in one lap for each round. 1.51.055, 1.50.157, and 1.50.456 respectively for each of the three rounds.  Hamilton was 5.872 seconds behind me and he took P2.  Alonso was on P3.

On race day, I was genuinely worried about tire wear.  So I started easy having tire management in mind.  Pulled away from the cars behind using KERS on start-finish line, the gap was gradually opened.  I was running at 25% race.  That translates to 15 laps.  Lap 7, I pitted for the prime tires.  Normally when I came out of the pit, I would be behind the front runners yet to pit.  Not this time.  The gap was large enough to absorb the pit stop.  Boy, that felt good as I rejoined on P1.

I thought the rest of the race would be uneventful.  Lap 11 onward, I got a chance to overtake trains of black markers.  I even got a taste of the DRS zone.  Last 3 laps, the rain has started.  Uh-oh.  The track was getting a little more slippery and my tires were getting a little more worn out.  There were heaps of black markers in front of me.  I nursed the car and finished the race after 29 minutes and 4.320 seconds with a best lap time of 1.52.814.

Besides taking P1, I have also unlocked the Domination PS3 trophy by setting the fastest lap in all sessions through the race weekend.  Hamilton was on P2, 1.16.577 minutes behind me.  Webber was on P3 while my rival Button was on P8.

Another 25 championship points for Toro Rosso and me.  I don’t think I can win this season against Hamilton.  My goal is to beat Alonso and finish 2nd.

Career – Japan

Japan, ah.  Finally I got a taste of Suzuka.  It is the only F1 circuit that is crisscrossed.  That means first you start clockwise, then flip to anti-clockwise.  On third stint, flip back to clockwise.  Suzuka has a humbling opening sector too.  Entering Turn 1 with that long straight going down-slope to First Curve, there is a tendency to carry too much speed and land onto the gravel.  “S” Curves and Dunlop Curve are a series of S-shaped up-slope chicanes that test one’s confidence in holding the full throttle while not leaving the track.  There are 5 turns in total.  Amazing stuff.

Turn 8 and 9 are beautiful.  They remind me of Italy’s Curva di Lesmo but are less punishing.  It is a down-slope drive and the design of the angle is perfect in flowing through to the 90-degree turn.  Depending on the car’s setup and how steady the steering is, it is possible to drive through Turn 12 with DRS wing open.  Then comes the Spoon Curve whereby it is crucial to get it right so as to build momentum into yet another long straight up the slope.  Because …

… up ahead is the famous 130R.

130R is breathtaking.  It is perhaps the highest speed corner in F1.  Entering 130R at top speed, when judged right, it is possible to take the turn with full throttle, leaving the car on 7th gear.

Entering the race weekend, I have already won 4 races straight.  How is it possible?  The Toro Rosso car must have made a difference compared to HRT.  Later, I discovered that R&D results are bound to the player, and not the car team (strange eh?).  That may have made the car more competitive.  And who knows?  My driving skill may have improved over that many races and that many laps?

Edit: There is a R&D bug and unfortunately, I keep on repeating the same test throughout the season and have received no upgrade parts. Hence, I could safely remove R&D advantage out of the equation.

Practice day is always a day for a reality check.  My best lap time was 1.43.310, which was 2.681 seconds ahead of Hamilton.  I must say, Hamilton was on fire going after me throughout the race weekend.  In my alternative universe, he is leading the scoreboard by a mile.  Q1, Q2, and Q3, I did 1.43.542, 1.42.363, and 1.41.202 respectively.  Hamilton was on P2 and the gaps were 1.120 seconds, 1.917 seconds, and 3.037 seconds.  In retrospect, I should have done a single lap in Q3 and saved the tires for the race day.  But I saw my timing tumbled by a second after 130R.  I could not resist not to further stamp my authority onto this track.  I mean, this could well be once in a lifetime opportunity for, who knows, I may tune up the game’s difficulty level in the next season.

One point to note though is that Q2 was rather frustrating for me.  The traffic was horrible.  I could try to build a gap between the cars in front and I like F1 drivers do.  But once I hit First Curve, I was often greeted by a train of cars entering the circuit for a warm-up lap.  It is near impossible to overtake on “S” Curves without compromising too much on the racing line.

Race day I started on pole and the first part of the race was rather uneventful.  First few laps with heavy fuel load, the car felt slow.  To open up the gap and burn some fuel, I dialed to fuel mix 3 straight the way.  I did not think I would need the extra fuel to defend my position later in this race.

The excitement came when I pitted on lap 5.  At pit exit, there were heaps of cars entering First Curve.  I was in no mood to stuck behind the slower cars and crawl through “S” Curves.  So I burned some KERS trying to overtake using my cold prime tires.  Whoa, that was risky.  Up ahead, one of the Red Bull cars lost control and parked in the middle of the road.  I had to brake heavy and dashed to the right in order to avoid a collision.  Some cars behind me were not so fortunate.  Yellow flag was out, briefly.

I did not know when Alonso overtook Hamilton.  I took the checker flag at P1.  Alonso was on P2 (30.593 seconds behind) and Hamilton P3.  The race ended after 23 minutes 11.978 seconds.  My best lap time was 1.43.389.  I reckon if I was to start on prime, I might have a better record.

From the championship point of view, Hamilton has 281 points.  Alonso has 177 and as for me, 171. 110 points behind Hamilton.  With 5 more races to go, I am merely delaying the inevitable.

Career – Korea

To recap, I have picked Button from the McLaren team as my rival.  If I can beat him in 7 races, I get to take his seat on the Brazilian GP.  I did not think I could even remotely do it.  But Toro Rosso has been kind to me.  While the car seems less drivable than my old HRT, it does have the performance.  And KERS.  Korea was my 4th race against Button, my chance to win the Rival Challenge.

The Korea track is a rather forgiving track.  Plenty of runoff areas (not that you would runoff that often anyway).  It is not hard to master.  Sector one has three long straights.  Sector two starts with three very slow turns that can put me to sleep.  Then a slightly curved straight building up to a few exciting, albeit easy curves.  Just when I am looking for a climax, I am hit by a slow Turn 10 (duh!) and a series of S-shaped curves that are as entertaining as the “S” Curves in Japan.  Instead of 5, there are 8!  My problem with these sorts of curves is that with an auto-gearbox, the constant gear hunting kills me.  But when done right, you can really feel the momentum carried forward to another turn, and another turn.

Until the whole process repeats again.

Yet another dry weekend, I clocked a lap time of 1.47.942 during practice session, 6.822 seconds ahead of Button who was on P2.  The tire wear was alarming.  It was as bad as the Singapore track.  I do not understand why.  Perhaps I drive too aggressively.

Q1, I did a 1.48.862 on prime tires with one hot lap.  Hamilton was 3.689 seconds behind me taking P2.  Since the gap looked good, on Q2, I used the scrubbed tires from Q1.  P1 with a slightly worse lap time of 1.49.234.  I tried another round but could not improve.  Hamilton was 3.186 seconds slower than me and I was happy.

Q3, I have a new strategy.  I put on brand new option tires, clocked in one hot lap (a rather disappointing 1.48.627), and slowed down considerably for my in-lap.  I wanted to save my tires for the race day.  Still, I was 3.979 seconds faster than Hamilton.  Alonso was on P3.

I think I can now relate to Vettel.  Since the car is competitive, all I need is to qualified pole and on race day, run away from the cars behind me and focus on opening gaps.  I did exactly that in Korean GP.

My rival challenge must have motivated Button a great deal.  Because on the opening lap, he shot up from P6, gained 4 positions, and onto P2.  Hamilton dropped further down in the field and I was happy for a moment.  Because he is my world championship rival.

By the time I pitted, I have opened up nearly half a minute gap with Button.  I rejoined at P1 and watched intensively on how the race unfolded at the back.

Somehow, Hamilton managed to pass Alonso.  No!  3 laps left, he was within 1 second behind Button.  Oops.  That was bad news for me.  Onto the last lap, Hamilton was within 0.6 second.  When I took the checker flag, the gap between Button and Hamilton was reduced to 0.4 second.

The bad news is, Hamilton took P2.  The good news is, I will drive a McLaren in Brazil.  Entertainingly so, I enjoyed overtaking two trains of black markers on this race.

The Korean race ended after 26 minutes 11.062 seconds (best lap time was 1.49.428).  Hamilton was 1 minute 5.075 seconds behind me.  Button took P3.  At the podium, I was sandwiched by two McLaren drivers.

From the championship’s perspective, Hamilton is leading with 299 points.  I am promoted to a second position with 196 points.  And Alonso is at 189.

A deficit of 103 points with 4 more races to go, the world championship of season one goes to Hamilton!

Career – India

I have practiced very hard on the India track. Because it is really hard.  No wonder the F1 drivers love this track.  It has good elevation and Turn 10 and 11 demand lots of concentration.

Sector 1 is cake, long straights and simple turns.  Sector 2 is probably one of the hardest sectors I have experience.  It is hard to judge how much speed I can get away with when tackling Turn 5, 6, and 7. The turns are tight.  Precision in staying with the racing line is a must.  The loop at Turn 10/11 is unique.  If my speed is too low, I would go off the track to the right.  If my speed is too high, left I would go.  If I am unable to tuck in at the exit of Turn 11, that would mess up my Turn 12.

Sector 3 is not easy either.  I am always terrible in 90-degree turns.  It is so easy to exit Turn 13 with too low a speed (1st gear duh).  It is also a challenge to hold 3rd gear at Turn 15.  All in all, I am experiencing a lot of understeering problem in this circuit.  The car just wouldn’t turn where I want it to.  Tire wear is exceptionally high on this circuit as well.

By right, I did not need to race that hard for the remaining of the season.  World championship hope is gone.  Rival challenge is a success.  I do wish to match Ascari and Schumacher’s 7 consecutive wins record though.

Besides, India circuit is fun, albeit hard.  The race ended after 25 minutes 2.668 seconds (best lap time was 1.36.791).  Rain started to fall on the last two laps.  Fortunately, I took the checker flag on dry tires, without an extra pit stop. P1.

Practice: P1 1.34.865 (+4.474 Grosjean)

Q1: P1 1.37.205 (+1.569 Di Resta) [prime]
Q2: P1 1.35.461 (+2.497 Button) [scrubbed prime]
Q3: P1 1.34.705 (+2.724 Alonso) [option]

Race: P1 (+38.554 Alonso at P2, Webber at P3)

Career – Abu Dhabi

Yas Marina track in Abu Dhabi is beautiful.  The changing artificial light from the surrounding buildings, the twilight as the race enters into evening hours, the reflection of light upon the car, the glaring of the setting sun – all and more that makes this track unique.

I have done this track numerous times during the Young Drivers’ Test evaluation.  It is a pretty technical circuit.  But once I memorize the turns and with anticipation, it is not that hard.  I discover that I can keep the DRS wing opened through Turn 15 and 16.  That is neat.  It is easy to overshot on Turn 19.  The rest of the turns have a nice speed build up to the start-finish line.  Yas Marina is enjoyable, once I master it.

I do not know if there is rain in Abu Dhabi.  Reading Wikipedia, it does not seem so.  Sandstorms maybe.  But here in F1 2012 the video game, anything can happen.  Practice day started with heavy rain, in a desert.  The weather dried up on second stint.  I stayed out through the 1 hour practice.  The twilight at dusk was captivating.  Unfortunately, the race only lasted 26 minutes 41.650 seconds.  I did not get to see the sky turned into darkness on race day.  Nevertheless, I have thoroughly enjoyed the race.  Took the checker flag at P1 with a gap of 1 minute 11.772 seconds in front of Hamilton.  Vettel took the last spot on the podium.

Practice: P1 1.50.907 (+5.742 Vettel)

Q1: P1 1.51.500 (+4.436 Button) [prime]
Q2: P1 1.49.911 (+5.046 Hamilton) [option]
Q3: P1 1.50.293 (+3.475 Vettel) [option]

Best lap time on race day: 1.51.682

Career – United States

Thanks to my technicians at Toro Rosso (a.k.a. PS3 bug), I nearly lost the race.  But I will get to that a little bit later.  Now is time to sing praises for this brand new Austin circuit to be debuted next weekend.

Austin track is breathtaking.  You start at the back of a long straight going up the hill.  At the top, a tight hairpin drops the speed to low before the opening sequence of a series of S-shaped chicanes that resembles the S-Curves in Japan.  6 turns in total while climbing uphill before opening up to Turn 9.  If the exit angle of Turn 8 is not optimal, Turn 9 would be a disaster.  Passing Turn 10 is a downhill drive to yet another tight hairpin before the longest straight in this circuit.  Turn 13 through 15 are likely to be demanding to the tires.  You can really feel the lack of grip with worn tires.

The half-circle Turn 16 through 18 going downhill is exhilarating.  Flat out on the throttle with the steering on max, the space is just nice to swing the car into the 90-degree Turn 19 before the closing Turn 20.  What a fun track to drive.  There seems to be enough overtaking opportunities.  While the track is generously wide, overtaking off the racing line does not seem to be easy.  Because it hurts the exit speed too much.

US race was meant to be my last race with Toro Rosso (yet another PS3 bug to be covered in the next race).  On race day, I started on pole with I thought a set of near pristine option tires that I have used for one hot lap in Q3.  Five lights out and I immediately noticed something abnormal.  I had no grip.  I burned all my KERS and still, Alonso cut into the chicane from my left, blocking me from the racing line.  In order to avoid an accident, I ran a little wide.  Instantly, the two Red Bull drivers Vettel and Webber overtook me from left and right!  Wow, something was definitely not right.  I have been taking it easy for the past few races and this race did not go as what I have anticipated.

Through gusty aggressive drive, I put the two bulls behind me.  But I was still not close enough to take down Alonso.  Exit Turn 11 and onto the long straight, I tailgated the Ferrari as closely as I could, dialed the fuel mix to 3.  I out-braked Alonso at Turn 12 and took back the lead.  Turn 13 through 15 were surprisingly slippery.  I nearly lost control of the car.  What happened?!

Was it because (1) it was heavy rain the day before during qualifying rounds and the track was still wet, (2) my technician has mistakenly fitted a set of worn option tires during Q3 (i.e. PS3 bug), or (3) rival team has sabotaged my tires overnight (i.e. magic)?

I had no idea.  My tires were all worn.  On second tap, I lost control of the car at several spots and it was really hard to keep the car on the road.  I had to drive really slowly through some of the chicanes.  Still, that did not always help.  My tires had no grip.

By lap 6 of 14, I dived into the pit for a – I hoped – brand new prime tires.  I rejoined at P4, nearly got into an accident with Grosjean on the right.  I burned some of the KERS just to got pass him.  OK.  The new tires felt great.  I was back in the game.  In front, was Massa.  Before I got a chance to hunt him down, he dived into the pit.  And then, I had Button in front at P1 on option, still yet to make his pit stop.  At the same spot I overtook Alonso on lap 1, I shot pass Button.  It was P1 all the way to the checker flag.

Gosh.  What a hard earned win.  The race ended after 26 minutes 18.128 seconds.  Vettel took P2 with a 40.337 seconds gap, followed by Webber.

Practice: P1 1.46.372 (+6.185 Hamilton)

Q1: P1 1.46.615 (+5.231 Maldonado) [prime]
Q2: P1 1.45.170 (+5.635 Hamilton) [scrubbed prime]
Q3: P1 1.47.348 (+3.544 Alonso) [option]

Best lap time on race day: 1.47.007.

Career – Brazil

OK.  Yet another PS3 bug, or shall I say, in the world of virtual F1, anything is possible.

I have beaten Button in my first season’s rival challenge.  McLaren has written an email to me saying how excited they are to welcome my arrival in Brazil.  In the past 7 races, I worked so hard to see this happens.  But it did not happen.  McLaren must have forgotten that we had a deal.  Button might have pulled out more sponsors than I do.  Ah, whatever.  I am still with Toro Rosso and to be honest, Toro Rosso has been really kind to me.  I have an excellent car to drive and in all my races with STR, I have taken home the win.  Any sane F1 driver would have stayed with Toro Rosso.  Any smart tier-1 car teams would want me as their driver.  I am not logical.  Neither is the rather buggy PS3 game.

While I enjoy qualifying pole and keep winning races, I must say, the most thrilling fun was back in the beginning of my rookie season, when I was driving for HRT.  My heart raced.  Very often, my hands would sweat so much that I could not even control the car.  It was chasing dreams, not seeing an inevitable victory to be unfolded.  After that little episode in USA whereby my technicians screwed up my tires (more like Codemasters has screwed up on the development of the game), the first stint of the race was extraordinarily exciting.  I wanted that feeling.  So, for the Brazil race, which I have nothing to lose, not even that promised McLaren seat to gain, I took part in the practice session without any prior experience with the track.

The Brazil track is surprisingly easy to drive.  Very thrilling on such a short circuit.  The only challenging bit – for me – is Curva do Laranjinha through Pinheirinho.  Control of the throttle and the steering precision at the hairpin is the key.  The build up from Turn 13 through 14 and 15 and finally to the long straight is exhilarating.  You can easily hit the rev limiter before you even hit the start-finish line.

On race weekend, I was upbeat after the practice session.  I was new to this track and have done OK.  On Q3, after putting in a hot lap, I wanted to call it a day.  But on my 2nd lap, after seeing that I have shaven close to 1 second to my Q2 timing, the F1 racing spirit in me was ignited.  I further knocked my 1st lap timing down by a full second.  Man, I felt good.

The race ended after 24 minutes 3.994 seconds.  Took the checker flag at P1, Hamilton was 37.965 seconds behind me, followed by Vettel.

That is the end of my season 1 career.  11 wins and 11 pole positions.  A total of 296 championship points putting me #2 in the scoreboard sandwiched between Hamilton and Alonso.  At the end of the race, the game asked if I wish to advance to season 2.  Why not?

And then Christmas has arrived.  I am indeed starting with McLaren, as their number 1 driver with Hamilton – one of my favorite drivers in F1 – as my teammate.  I have a good feel that we will win the constructor championship in season 2.  Hamilton, I am counting on you!

Practice: P1 1.17.937 (+2.347 Button)

Q1: P1 1.18.255 (+1.244 Di Resta) [prime]
Q2: P1 1.17.729 (+0.914 Vettel) [scrubbed prime]
Q3: P1 1.16.713 (+1.967 Ham) [option]

Best lap time on race day: 1.18.216

 

Categories
Action & Thriller Movie Reviews

Premium Rush – These Are Mad Cyclists!

I can’t quite pinpoint why I am not too hot about this generally positively reviewed movie.  Maybe I just don’t like to see Chinese getting beaten by a White guy throughout the movie.  Or the stereotype of Chinese again being the ones running illegal gambling joints and involved in all sorts of mafia related activities.  Maybe I just don’t feel right to see glorified mad cyclists risking their lives and the lives of others for something they enjoy doing.  I then ask myself: There are mad motorists in the movies too so why not mad cyclists?  I don’t know.  I have nothing against cyclists as I was one back in UK.  Here in Singapore, I have seen mad cyclists going against the direction of traffic (just like this movie), cutting through lanes in town during rush hours (just like this movie), and even diving into a slip road leading to a highway.  When the bad cop in the movie said to Joseph Gordon-Levitt the mad cyclist, “This whole city hates you”.  I wanted to leap up and cheer.  Momentarily, that zero is my hero.

Cynthia picked Premium Rush because she wanted to see Robin in action.  TK couldn’t remember who Joseph Gordon-Levitt was.  The Dark Knight Rises?  Inception?  (500) Days of Summer?  I like Joseph Gordon-Levitt in (500) Days of Summer.  From the acting performance point of view, Joseph did a great job in Premium Rush.  The bike stuns he performed are jaw dropping.  There is close to no romance in this movie.  The entire movie is about a couple of cyclists rushing packages from one end of town to another.  Timeline is altered backward and forward very much like How I Met Your Mother.  This keeps the plot interesting throughout the movie.  The bad cop – the only villain played by Michael Shannon – is pretty hilarious to watch, albeit borderline psychotically scary.  Some scenes are totally unnecessary (like the mobs towards the end) and the entire story from beginning to the end, to me, is rather pointless.  A bad cop has killed someone and that’s OK, no hard feeling.  He needs the money badly to pay off his debt so he has decided to steal from a woman.  A woman needs to transfer a vast amount of cash from point A to point B via an underground bank.  A few cyclists who are caught in the middle of all these strange activities.  Having said that, the story is rather original, told in a rather unusual way.  I can understand why some would enjoy watching Premium Rush.

Categories
Snippet of My Life

Snippet Of My Life Episode 36 – The Songs Of The Bees

How time flies!  The last Dooku story was told two years ago.  To satisfy your curious mind, Dooku no longer works in an office.  The only thing human about human resource is that: Do you have the arms and legs to do the job?  Oh yes.  And a brain that performs basic functions which may or not not include the ability to perceive or articulate senses that are deemed common.  It was an eyeopening experience for Dooku.  Because alas!  In reality, there is nothing human about human resource.  Very soon, Dooku finds himself being re-purposed, and then re-purposed again.  Aspiration is an illusion one creates in order to mask the lack of a direction one partakes.  Organization is an entity that keeps on reorganizing itself from within.  In the end, only the bees sing the songs inspired by the backward wind of change that swirls in a downward spiral.  At infinity, it is a beeline to nothingness.

*     *     *     *     *

One day, Dooku has decided to leave the city.  In his usual state of hungriness, he has stumbled upon a village called Bumble Bees and the Magic Flute.  How odd the name is.  How odd the village appears.  But that did not matter.  With no money in his pocket, all Dooku could think of was: What’s for dinner tonight?

By now, Dooku has worked in this village for quite some time.  Not long enough to feel like home.  But not short enough to cling onto the joy of discovering new things the first time either.  One fine morning, one of the elders approaches him and says, “We have a crisis.  It is time to re-purpose your role in this village again, Dooku”.  Dooku is surprised, though not that surprised.  He replies, “It was only recently when I was re-purposed to become a blacksmith plan designer.  So soon?”

“It is never too soon, son.  You see.  Our village exports magic flutes and right now, magic appears to have stopped working.  Our customers from outside our village are not happy.”

Dooku should have said, “But I know nothing about magic!  Or flute for that matter!  Surely you can find someone better to re-purpose?”  Instead, he nods, unintentionally encouraged the elder to carry on.

The elder shakes his head in distress and continues, “There is a massive shift of magnet core interfering with the vines that give forth magic.  Without its sustenance, the vines are interlocked with its surrounding energy.  Quite simply put, some of our magic flutes sold to our customers have stopped working.  Do you see the gravity of the situation, Dooku?  The pulsation is killing the system!  You can feel it, can’t you?”

Dooku looks out to the horizon thinking about today’s dinner.  The elder takes it as a sign of contemplation and secretly admire Dooku’s dedication to the village.  This one gets it.  After a long moment, Dooku speaks, like he does every time he is re-purposed, “So tell me what I have to do.”

Throughout the day and night, jars of honey are being brought in by the flying owls.  Inside each jar, all sorts of messages and communications between the customers and villagers – past and present – are preserved within the honey.  These are the messages to be listened to, not read.  Messages of how broken magic flutes are affecting the customers’ lives.  Messages of the villagers asking the customers to be patience.  Messages of the customers demanding the magic flutes to be working, now.  Messages of the villagers trying all that they can to resume magic.  Messages of desperation, of suggestion, of threat, and of imploration.  Messages of missing messages.

In the village of Bumble Bees and the Magic Flute, language is a collection of the songs of the bees.  Writing is not necessary.  Ideas are painted by a honey brush, spoken through the bees.  New ideas are added onto the old ones.  Mixed together.  Blended into one single jar of honey.  Preserved by honey.  Ideas are made timeless.

Each morning as Dooku arrives at work, the first thing he has to deal with are 200 jars of honey delivered overnight.  He opens up the honey jar one by one and listen to its content.  With very little knowledge of what magic flute does, Dooku would pick up his honey brush, add on a polite acknowledge that is neither helpful nor meaningful, and return the honey jars to the senders using the owls.  A little bit of honey is now added into the honey jar as Dooku solidifies his thought, his thought of acknowledgement.

Dooku ponders: Someone needs to keep an eye on the overall big picture.  Songs intertwined are weaved into a tapestry made of new pieces of human knowledge accumulated daily that form a whole new honey world.  An ocean of honey understood only by the keen observers.  The song weavers.  One such as Dooku.

Honey jars come in batches.  The more Dooku handles, the more they arrive.  As the day goes by, every time when the number reduces to manageable size, the owls fly in and deliver a new batch of honey jars.

Dooku has developed a habit.  Towards the end of day, whenever the number of honey jars reaches zero or the closing hour is at hand, he would close his eye and slowly tune out the surrounding.  There are no owls.  No honey jars.  There are no anxious customers.  No magic related problems.  He has handled 500 honey jars today and that is enough.  In his head, there is nothing but the songs of the bees.  Of honey baked chicken and honey cake with caramelized pears, lemon honey water, maybe honey ginger tea.  There is no way to keep a public toilet clean so long as people keep on peeing.  Dooku feels the growling of his stomach.  He is ready to go home.

That night, Dooku has a dream.  In his dream, on the next day, more honey jars are delivered.  Many more indeed.  Customers are demanding answers to why their magic flutes are still not working.  This time, directly to Dooku.  By the hours, the situation is snowballing to a whole new level of epic failure.  Honey jars upon honey jars, they are strapped onto Dooku’s body.  Are you reading mine now?  Aren’t you answering me now?  In this ocean of honey, the songs of the bees can be deafening.  The only thing Dooku can do is to drown himself into the honey, weighed down by the jars.  There is an eerie sense of clamminess underneath.  Dooku is falling asleep, but he wants to wake up.  What if he doesn’t wake up the next day?  1,000 jars of honey will be waiting.  Next week?  3,500 jars of honey will be waiting.  By the end of next year?  Maybe magic will resume working.  All the problems will disappear.

That may not be a bad idea at all.

The owls keep coming.  And the honey jars pile up.  Darkness falls but the problems don’t go away.  The wind of change is howling.  From this point onward, it is all going down.

Categories
For the Geeks

6,311 Hours Of Played Time: World Of Warcraft

At times I ask myself: Am I playing too much World of Warcraft?  It is hard to comprehend what 6,311 hours mean without a context.  My record shows that I have played this online game since the beginning of 2005, spent more than US$1,000 on subscription fees.  I don’t play WoW every day.  As of now, I haven’t touched the game for months.  But when I touch it, I could go crazy with it.

Theramore, Destroyed.  Jaina Proudmoore’s hair has turned white.  Hellscream is safe and sound.  What’s next?

Typically for me, a video game takes around 40 hours to consume.  A good game may eat up 80 to 120 hours of my life.  The third expansion Cataclysm was released two year ago.  That expansion alone I have clocked in roughly 1,700 hours –  the most played expansion of all.

There has been great debate on how Cataclysm flares compared with the previous expansions, even with the original game released in 2004.  There are fans who say that it is disappointing.  The sales figure also seems to support that sentiment.  Towards the end of the expansion, even the developers feel the heat and the need to reverse a good portion of their design philosophy.  This clearly has an impact on WoW’s next expansion Mists of Pandaria, which is due to be out in a few days’ time.  The question is: Is Cataclysm all that bad?

Personally, I welcome a better emphasis on skill-based rather than gear-based approach.  The content at the beginning of the expansion was significantly harder than before.  That required us to reexamine our priority system.  I love the challenge, although I must say, Blizzard seems to have over-engineered some of the game mechanics.

The problem of this increased challenge is that some players no matter how hard they tried or read from the Internet simply could not bridge that gap.  In the previous expansions, we could compensate skill with gears earned through persistence.  That did not seem to work for the first year of Cataclysm.  To make it worse, the then-high-end content failed to reward the effort required.  The net result?  People were frustrated.  Relationships were strained because not everyone performed or could perform at the same level.

On the plus side, I like the bite size stories spread across the new zones.  I also like the new dailies hub that evolves as we progress.  The quests do not feel too taxing either.  And I like how Blizzard opens up raiding to the less hardcore players.  Being able to collect an armor set that was used to be exclusive to raiders who invest immense amount of time and sacrifice is one good news (ironically, I do not seem to invest any less played time either).

What’s Next?

Having played the beta of the new expansion Mists of Pandaria and having seen some of the new game updates, I must say that I am underwhelmed.  The graphics look dated.  World of Warcraft indeed plays like an aging game.  Fans would defend this online game by pointing to the fact that game play is the most important aspect of all.  But there is a limit to how far this saying could go.

My friends and I have recently logged back in and tried out the new scenario mode.  That was insanely boring.  Perhaps if we haven’t tried the latest massively multiplayer online game, we could have overlooked these flaws.  Would I continue to pay US$14.99 a month to play this game?  Cynthia’s commitment to the annual pass deal will continue till end of this year.  Hence, we may still get the new expansion and try it out.

This time round, I doubt I would pushed the played time beyond 7,000 hours.  I sure pray that I won’t.

While the scenarios from both the Horde and Alliance perspective are incredibly boring, we took a screenshot nonetheless.
Categories
Fantasy & Sci-fi Movie Reviews

Resident Evil: Retribution (IMAX 3D) – A Prequel or What?

It was our buddy TK’s childhood dream to watch an IMAX 3D movie.  In this dream of his, the theater would have a dome shaped ceiling.  We would lean back and watch the movie projected high above us.  That visualization reminded me of my childhood memory inside a Space Museum in Hong Kong.  So I said yes to a S$22 door ticket – double of what I usually pay – for a movie that is likely to suck.

There was no dome shaped ceiling.  For future reference, it would have been called OMNIMAX instead.  The screen was gigantic though.  The image was crisp.  The color seen through the cheap 3D glasses at Shaw Cinema was surprisingly vibrant.  In one particular scene, Milla Jovovich entered from the far side of the tunnel, where the light source was.  The tunnel was long, dark, and the floor was wet.  The 3D effect was so good that I could feel the depth of the tunnel.  As though the silver screen was eaten by a giant black hole.

In fact, the 3D effect of this zombies infested movie was so good that I could not sleep well that very evening.  Mind you, these are not household zombies.  These are mutated zombies with four large and gruesome tentacles coming out from their mouths.  Die zombies.  Why don’t you just die?!

And hence the problem.  Zombies don’t die easy, if at all it dies.  I have no idea what would kill a zombie.  The violence taken towards the zombies are extreme.  From close quarter combat to close range shooting, it is violence to the power of violence.  I was so concerned that Cynthia could not take it.  To my surprise, after the show ended, she exclaimed, “This is actually good!”

And she added, “Girl power!”

Perhaps that is what makes Resident Evil: Retribution entertaining to some: Girl power.  Come to think on it, this genre is quite rare.  Blood the Last Vampire is one.  The Thai action movie Chocolate is another.  I love seeing girls taking the leads on an action film.  Not the type of action like Charlie’s Angels.  But real action like Resident Evil.

The problem I have with Retribution is that the story line has become too simplistic and unrealistic.  It was a straightforward rescue mission.  Alice (played by Milla Jovovich) is captured by Umbrella Corporation.  A squad is sent in for the rescue.  And then we have Ada Wong (played by Li Bingbing) who would have been great had she actually become Alice’s true sidekick and stuck with Alice.  But she disappeared halfway.  Alice has to fight against the artificial intelligence Red Queen who commands an army of zombies.  Now, why does Umbrella Corporation so hellbent in eliminating mankind while, I suppose, they profit from selling weapons to the human?  I have no idea.  Retribution is one bizarre movie.  I don’t even know how the film title was derived.

Another problem I have with Retribution is that most main characters, except Alice, speaks in a one dimensional voice.  Like robots.  Like zombies if zombies could talk.  I read that Li Bingbing is a good actress.  It does not show in Retribution.  That was a disappointment.

Retribution reminds me of Twilight 4.  The whole movie is somewhat depressing.  Just when something exciting happens, just when I could smell the advent of an epic plot, I was slammed with ‘the end’.  Or rather ‘stay tuned’.  I gasped in disbelief.  TK turned around trying to comfort me, “Resident Evil never ends.  It is like that!”

I have thoroughly enjoyed the IMAX 3D effect (though TK highlighted to me that most scenes are not presented in 3D) and at the same time, I was thoroughly disappointed by the plot and the presentation.  This movie is a half-half for me.

Categories
Book Reviews Non-Fiction

Evangelizing Google+ And What The Plus! By Guy Kawasaki

It has been more than a year since I have joined the social network Google+.  Prior to that, I was pretty active in Facebook.  The decision to leave Facebook was not easy.  Because I have plenty of friends over there whom we interacted by the minute.  On top of that, I have a Twitter account.  I was used to tap onto the news of the world as often as I checked and updated the Facebook status.  When I got to try out Google+, thanks to a beta invite, immediately I have recognized something special about the then-new social network.  Something I could not pinpoint.  I have dropped Facebook almost completely except the couple of minutes I spend every other day.  And have gradually dropped Twitter.  I value my social networks.  But I do not have the time to commit to all of them out there.  There is no lukewarm commitment when it comes to building a new network.  You either in, or out.  At least for some of us who have a full time job and that social networking has no apparent benefits to our work.

So it was a clean start, with Google+.  I have struggled for half a year, trying to find my way and get more from it.  I am a persistence type, so I hang on, momentarily enjoyed the quietness due to a sudden drop of digital interaction.  Many friends whom I managed to convince did not stay in Google+ for long.  Because they could not find what they were looking for.  Fair enough.  Then something happened, that totally changed what Google+ means to me.  I began to actively interact with strangers who have similar hobbies and interests, a good sense of humor and maturity.  In return, they interact with me.  I approached Google+ with the Facebook mindset.  That did not work at all.  Google+ is a tool for you to circle interesting people, interact with strangers and develop relationship.  The growth of your network could be exponential.  It is less of a tool to add real life friends onto your existing network, which is what Facebook is for.  It is more of a tool to find new people from all over the world, beyond your real life social circles.

Guy Kawasaki – the author of What the Plus! – has accurately described what some of the major social networks are for.  That pinpoints the reason why I embrace Google+.  That is passions.

Twitter = Perceptions.

Facebook = People.

Pinterest = Pictures.

Google+ = Passions.

To further describe Google+, Kawasaki wrote:

Google+ enables you to pursue your passions with people you don’t know.  You 200 friends and family on Facebook may not share your passion for photography, but on Google+ you can have a blast with a community of photograpers.  In short, Google+ is for passions.

Do you want to enhance and expand the number of people who share your passions and interact with them via posts and comments?  If you do, focus on Google+.  If you don’t, stick with Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn until Google+ reaches critical mass.  If you just want to have fun posting pictures of cool stuff, use Pinterest.

Or, you may decide you need multiple services […]  That’s OK too.

As I have mentioned, I have struggled for quite a bit during my initial journey with Google+.  I wish I had a chance to read What the Plus!  The process of getting into and getting the most out of the network could have been quickened.  Guy Kawasaki was one of the first stranger I have added into my circle.  I did not know who he is.  But he appears to consistently share interesting stuffs in his stream.  And he appears to be popular in Google+.  In fact, as of today, he has close to 3 million followers.  When McGraw-Hill the book publisher approached me for the review of this book, my first reaction was: Kawasaki writes books?  Besides having published 11 books, Kawasaki is also the former Chief Evangelist of Apple.  He acts as a curator in Google+, sharing interesting stories to the community.

For those who are new to Google+, What the Plus! has tons of relevant tips.  It shows you the basic of how circle works and it quickly gets you started by populating your personal stream with relevant stories of your passions.  Many feedback I have with friends who tried out Google+ points to the observation that in their streams, they only see posts from the few persons day in and day out – like my posts.  Because I seem to be their only friend active in Google+.  It does not have to be that way.  There are tons of people in Google+ who are way more interesting than I am, with passions more relevant to you.  All you need to do is search them out by keywords or hash tags.  Find out who are consistently churning out quality posts and circle them.  Here are a few I have randomly dreamed of as illustrations.

What the Plus! also talks about how to create an enchanting profile.  Circling new people out there is one thing.  Getting others to circle you back is another.  Without these serendipity interactions, Google+ would at best be a Twitter to you.  Or at worst, a ghost town.  I agree with Kawasaki that a well written profile – very much your social resume – is important.  I seldom circle anyone in Google+ who does not invest time in doing up a profile or do not have a good history of public posts.  Because establishing trust in Google+ is the first step in building a relationship.  I cannot circle you if you have nothing interesting to say about yourself or anything in life.

Most who are used to Facebook culture would be reluctant to post in public when they first visit Google+.  It took me a while to convince my wife Cynthia that Google+ works in a completely different way.  Her comment after a few months of using Google+?  It surprises her much that even as she posts in public, she feels that her privacy is better respected in Google+.  All her interactions do not get broadcast in a ticker form, like Facebook does.  No one has a complete picture on what she does in Google+.  Not even I.  She may have commented on some posts about learning Spanish outside my radar.  Or with someone who is not in my circle.  In Google+, it is very clear who can see what, down to the individual comment and post.

Because Google+ works differently from other social networks, to thrive and get the most out from it, eloquence in everything you do is essential.  What the Plus! gets you covered, from how to post and comment, share posts and photos, to how to respond to comments and Hangout (a video chat with up to 10 people).  As someone who has already been using Google+ for quite some time, I find the tips useful.  I have learned a few things from this book too.  What the Plus! also contains tons of resources in getting help as well as enhancing your Google+ experience.  Kawasaki publishes the links in the form of QR codes.  There is also a chapter written by guest author Lynette Young specifically targeted to the women users.

I endorse 99.9% of What the Plus!  I have one discomfort though.  Kawasaki mentioned in multiple times that we should share posts from 10 a.m. Pacific to 10 p.m. Pacific […] when the spammers in Asia are asleep (page 83).  And on post scheduling, he is willing to sacrifice the aesthetics of a post in order to avoid the spammy and insipid comments that occur when Southeast Asia is awake (page 190).

Ouch.  I am from Asia, in particularly Southeast Asia.  Hence my spirit of evangelizing this book is slightly dampened.  I suppose when you have 3 million followers, spamming could be a valid concern.  I run a website that is bombarded by hundreds and thousands of spam comments a day.  I install an add-on to deal with them.  It sounds like Guy Kawasaki is frustrated with Google’s inability to completely stem the spammers.  I sincerely hope that the situation will improve for him, and that he may recognize that Google+ has a global reach beyond the US time zones.

In summary, What the Plus! provides a good introduction to those who are serious or curious about Google+.  It is less likely that you will gain 3 million followers like Kawasaki does by reading this book.  However, reading What the Plus! will help you potentially skipping months of frustration and get you active in possibly one of the best social networks we have today – my opinion of course.

Categories
Drama

Step Up Revolution – Orgasmic!

Are you a fan of dance entertainment?  Are a fan of So You Think You Can Dance (SYTYCD)?  Are you in love with Kathryn McCormick of SYTYCD?  Well, if you do, you ain’t going to get a better treat than this.  Step Up Revolution got my heart racing inside the theater.  I so wanted to step up and move my body.  I have drooled watching Kathryn on screen.  Cynthia too.  So I guess that was fair play.

Now, before you rush out and buy a ticket to watch this orgasmic dance movie, there is something you must know.  Story-wise, there is nothing to cheer about.  Still, the plot seems to be better than what I have expected.  A bit cheesy?  Yes.  A bit over the top?  Certainly.  But the feel good factor is there.

Also, key acting scenes are pretty awkward to watch.  I suppose great dancers aren’t necessarily great actors.  One scene, I can tell that it was baked from many takes so much so that it was rather disturbing to watch.  That, or the film editor has done a not too good enough job.

These are the only two criticisms I have on Step Up Revolution.  For those who are new to SYTYCD, contestants are expected to dance a variety of genres.  Also, due to the show’s voting system, contestants are naturally likable, supremely entertaining.  They tease the audience with all sorts of appeals they have.  Some of the dancers in this movie come from SYTYCD.   Hence, you can imagine how sizzling hot this movie is.

The story of Step Up Revolution is based on the flash mob concept.  What these passionate dancers can do is truly amazing.  Each dance scene is unique, choreographed with a special theme in mind.  What Kathryn can do on screen reminds me of how gifted she and the rest of the SYTYCD contestants are.  One may say that if you have seen one Step Up, you have seen it all.  True.  However, I don’t mind getting entertained over and over again.

Categories
Book Reviews Non-Fiction

Confessions Of A Microfinance Heretic By Hugh Sinclair

The idea is beautiful.  By giving small, low-cost loans to the poor, entrepreneurial potential may be unleashed.  Profitable local businesses can lead to prosperity to the poor and to the community.  World poverty can be ended.  There are inspiring stories and photographs on how a mere $100 loan can change the life of a poor.  Royalty and celebrity alike lends support to this good course.  Money in the form of institutional and personal investment as well as donation pours into the microfinance industry.  Marketing campaigns target on our good human nature, letting us to see how poverty can be rid of one family at a time.  Would you want to help ending poverty?  And at the same time receive a return on your investment?

Nobel Prize winner Muhammad Yunus also known as the father of microfinance once said in an interview (2011 New York Times), “I have never imagined that one day microcredit would give rise to its own breed of loan sharks.  But it has.”

Hugh Sinclair – author of this book – who has worked in the microfinance industry from ground up gives a very different account on what this industry really looks like from the inside.  He has worked at a microfinance institution that distributes loans to the poor in South America and Africa.  He has seen how high the interest rate could be (in excess of 100%).  How in real life, many of the loans go into consumption (like buying a TV).  That because the investment comes from foreign countries, the money eventually gets out of the community leaving the poor poorer.  And how operationally inefficient these institutions can be with high salaries and overheads, commercial contracts going to relatives and friends.  He has seen the misalignment between the reality and the vision and mission statements like the one illustrated below.

To help the women in […] to relieve their poverty via self-employment, providing microfinance and technical assistance, while respecting their culture and human condition.

To be a self-sufficient microfinance institution with the principal objectives of poverty alleviation and the comprehensive development of the region.

Sinclair then moved up and worked in a Dutch microcredit fund management firm.  He has seen first hand how fund coming from the investors is channeled to the microfinance institutions with little due diligence.  At times, even when the fund managers know something is wrong with the microfinance institutions, so long as there is a good profit potential, they turn a blind eyes to the issues on the ground.  What about ending poverty?  Does it really matter when the investors are getting a return?

Sinclair tried to expose these irregularities, with the help of the rating agencies, even directly to the investors.  To his surprise, not even the investors want to listen to or action when the facts are laid clear on the table.  Meanwhile, with his passion of genuinely wanting to help the poor, again and again he was fired from his jobs.  The latest resulted in a Dutch court case.

That fortnight was tense.  I hardly slept.  Should I never have embarked on this battle in the first place?  A 99 percent chance of success is also a 1 percent chance of failure.  Taking on the beast is a noble idea, but had David missed Goliath with that fateful catapult shot, the story would probably not have made it into the Bible.  Professionally the situation could also be quite unpleasant.  How would I explain this to a future employer?

With all the evidence he has gathered throughout the years, he has turned into an activist.  He has become the ‘heretic’ voice on the microfinance industry that is seemingly corrupted from the investors to the major financial institutions, from the fund managers to the microfinance institutions.  There is a clear lack of regulation.  Self regulation is oxymoron.  Sinclair’s final breakthrough is getting Times‘s attention.  An article on this very topic was published revealing the ugly side of the sector to the public.

So, what is the problem with microfinance?

The problem is neither that the entire microfinance sector is evil, nor that the basic model is fatally flawed.  It is that greed, lack of oversight, recklessness in investing other people’s money, and ill-aligned incentives have allowed large parts of the sector to ignore the actual impact they are having on actual poverty reduction.

There are a few enlightened MFIs and funds that do actually benefit the poor […] Ethical funds do exist – they’re just hard to find.  The model does work.

I enjoy reading Confessions of a Microfinance Heretic.  Part of the book reads like a diary of Sinclair’s adventure to the developing countries.  Part of the book reads like a detective story as the author gathers evidence against the entire sector.  Although majority of the book talks about what does not work in this sector, there are some heartwarming stories whereby they show that when done right, microfinance does help the poor.

Sinclair’s approach is thorough.  From the investors and the intermediaries to the poor, looking at the operational,  political, and social angles, working through the legal system, the journalists, and eventually as an activist – I truly admire the author’s courage to speak up and telling the world that something is not right about the current state of microfinance.

This book may open up your eyes, like it does to mine.

Visit the author’s microfinance site here:  http://www.microfinancetransparency.com/

Publisher: Berrett-Koehler Publishers (July 9, 2012)
ISBN-10: 1609945182
ISBN-13: 978-1609945183

Categories
Diary

Looking At My 2-Year-Old-Ish Niece With Curious Eyes

My niece Bethany called me last Saturday while Cynthia and I were totally distracted by the aftermath of a glass jar jumped off a cabinet smashed into pieces.  No one claim responsibility.  But that was a great deal of debris to clear.  I heard the call but was unable to take.  Fortunately, I have invested in a digital answering machine.  Bethany promptly left me a message in English, after the beep I suppose.

“Kaofu, I want to see you today. Call me.”

Note: Kaofu is how she addresses me in Cantonese.  In Chinese culture, we don’t address each other by names.  Instead, by titles that indicate seniority.

My niece Bethany seems to like this photograph a lot. She kept on going back to this one as she browsed the album on my phone.

Wow, kids grow up fast these days.  She even has this notion of: If you don’t come and see me, I shall go and see you.  Impressed by my niece’s desire and determination to visit and since Cynthia took the car for her haircut appointment, I patiently waited at home, for Bethany and her entourage a.k.a. mom and dad to arrive.

The last time I met Bethany was half a month ago.  We went to Sentosa celebrating her mother – my sister – ‘s birthday.  Even till that very moment, my 2-year-old-ish niece hardly spoke a word to me or did we manage to have any meaningful conversation.  All was about to change last Saturday, when her linguistic ability [towards me] was unlocked.  Just like Stephen Hawking once described and made famous by Pink Floyd, she began to talk.

For millions of years, mankind lived just like the animals. Then something happened which unleashed the power of our imagination. We began to talk.

I could only imagine the joy of a 2-year-old when all of a sudden, she is able to articulate her thoughts and communicate with the external world her wants and desires.  All those years of crying, not knowing how to speak, vanished in thin air.  In return, the floodgate of words pour out from within.  She has learned to speak and listen.  Perhaps, that’s why as adults, we shall continue to learn new skills and sharpen existing ones so as to be able to do something we have yearned for, but are unable not do or do that well.  To articulate our musical thoughts, to cook a delicious meal, to play a beautiful sport, or to write something inspiring – all lead to moments of joy that can be invigorating and liberating at the same time.

I am not a fan of candies.  That explains why a box of candies next to my amplifier is still full.  In every visit, Bethany always attempts to open the box of candies, tightly sealed in a plastic container.  I was so used to talking to her as though I was talking to myself.  So subconsciously, last Saturday, I said to her, “Candies are bad for health.”  And I added, “Chocolate is also bad for health.”  Her parents smiled at my comment.

To that, Bethany replied with one word and she spoke slowly, “Moderation”.

I am sure all kids are super kids.  And I don’t suppose Bethany is any different from others.  This revelation has shocked me in a few ways.

  1. She appeared to listen to what I’ve said.
  2. She appeared to understand what I’ve said.
  3. She appeared to form an opinion and disagree with what I’ve said.
  4. She appeared to articulate the reason why candies and chocolate may not be all that bad.

I was shocked, and am impressed.

After that defining moment, I have come to the realization that this little one may be able to understand what I say.  Not only that, she begins to articulate what she wants.  We played some music – I was on the guitar and she on percussion.  We played a game she called duck-duck-goose, which is more or less like a hide-and-seek on steroid.  Bored of all the games we have played, she led me into my common bedroom.  And she said, “Close the door”.  My interpretation is that she likes things in order.  Open doors are to be closed, crumpled floor mats are to be straightened.  I promptly closed the door and observed her next move.

She went through my notepads and picked one that was blank.  She then chose a pen and has started drawing.  Frustrated by her lack of progress, she handed me the pen and said, “A dog”.  I doodled a dog.  Then she said, “A sheep”.  We took turn to draw and it went on and on until both of us were tired.

Bethany asked me to draw a school bus.  And I did.  She then ask me to draw a person.  Two, and three.  After I was done, she took the pen and started drawing vertical lines on the picture.  I asked, “What is that?”  She answered, “Rain”.  She passed the pen back to me and said, “Umbrellas”.  So I drew three umbrellas, one for each person (I presume her mom, her dad, and herself).  She then requested, “Draw thunder”.  I frowned and replied, “We can’t draw sound.  What we can do is to draw lightning that caused thunder.  Is that OK?”  She nodded and hence, I draw a lighting bolt.

Bethany then climbed to the guest bed, tugged herself nicely with a blanket.  I sat next to her pretending to dose off.  And I asked, “Bethany, tell me a story”.

“You tell me a story!” she giggled.

“No, you tell me a story!” I insisted.

She gave up and started a story, “Once upon a time …”

I looked at her closely and she giggled.  Bethany continued, “Once upon a time, there was a little Kaofo“.

At that my moment, my eyes were moist and my heart was melted.  She was telling a story about me!  Indeed, once upon a time, I was as little as Bethany.  What was on my mind back then?  Who did I want to be when I grew up?  What was my dream?  My mind drifted until Bethany pulled me back to reality.

“Once upon a time, there was a little Kaofo … [giggle] … you tell me a story!” said she.

I smiled and said, “Once upon a time, there was a little Kaofo.  He liked to play guitar … and he lives happily …”

To my surprised, Bethany completed my story with two words: Ever after.

My heart leaped in joy.

Before she left the common bedroom, she went through my oil painting collection.  Staring at the first one on the stand, she asked, “What is that?”  I replied, “These are wine bottles”.  Onto the second one, same question.  I replied, “This is Stitch, you favorite cartoon character”.  Onto the third one, she paused and rubbed her hands all over the painting.  Normally I would be quite mad.  But I recalled Randy Pausch‘s last lecture: The importance of people versus things (people come first, always!)  I laughed it off and gently told her that this might dirty her hands.  She seemed to get the message and she asked, “What is that?”  I stared at my third painting.  I genuinely did not know how to explain.  So I said, “I don’t know really.  This is abstract art”.

*     *     *     *     *

There is so much to learn from my 2-year-old-ish niece.  I can now understand why kids can be so addictive and adorable.  And I wonder when she will visit me next.

Categories
Comedy Movie Reviews

TED – What A Naughty, Naughty Teddy Bear

Finally, TED has arrived in Singapore.  I have been anticipating this film for ages.  Courtesy of omy.sg, Cynthia and I had a real good laugh watching TED in a preview screening session.  What’s there not to love about Ted the teddy bear who talks bad, takes drug, and gets drunk?  It’s hilarious.

Think on it, this film could have gone wrong in so many different ways.  Two grownups and a talking teddy bear living in our modern day society?  Miraculously, this film pulls through as something ‘believable’.  Thirty years ago, a boy made a wish for a teddy bear as a Christmas present.  That wish came true.  Later on, he made another wish that the bear would be able to talk.  Lo and behold, because magic could exist, we have a living and breathing teddy bear becoming the little boy’s new best friend.  The teddy bear has become headline news.  Alas, like all things in life, novelty wears off.  Thirty years later, no one cares for a talking teddy bear.  Life moves on.

The story then begins with the little boy John now grown up (Mark Wahlberg) and so is Ted.  John has fallen in love with Lori (Mila Kunis).  But will a man who still hangs out with his teddy bear be able to truly love another person?  Well, that is where the drama begins.

TED is a joy to watch, all credit to two ingredients.  First, the teddy bear on the big screen does look realistic and appears to interact with the actors well.  Remember Star Wars I when Jedi Liam Neeson couldn’t see eye-to-eye with Jar Jar Binks?  Ted the teddy bear seems very much alive in the movie.  Second, the script coming out from Ted’s mouth is hilarious.  At some parts of the film, the scriptwriter has established a pattern so well that the audience would laugh even before the line is out.

Fun stuff aside, TED is a heartwarming film.  There are some tearing moments.  Above all, the chemistry between Mark Wahlberg and Mila Kunis is convincing.

TED is about changes in life that upset the status quo.  It is a story of growing up and learning to live with someone new.  On a separate note, watching TED reminds me of a novel written by Clifford Chase called Winkie.  In that book, the story begins with Winkie the teddy bear arrested for terrorism because he happens to be at the wrong place in the wrong time.  That book too is hilarious, more so in a dark comedy’s way.  I think I may pick up Winkie when I have the bandwidth to do some reading.