Fragments Of My Dreams Episode 7 – Doctor, Actor, Law Enforcer


Part 1 – Doctor

In this war torn city of my homeland, I was leading a rescue team to search for someone dear to my heart. The order, the transport system, the city’s prosperity, all dissolve because of this God forsaken war. The roads are hardly recognizable, with buildings and structures all crumble into blocks of concrete piling up onto one another in the most random manner that perhaps in peace time, people may admire that arrangement in an artistic way – even if this pile of meaningless structure is titled as depressing as “My Once Called Home”.

I tried to fasten the pace of my rescue team but in this cold winter, there is only that much the team can push forward.

Then I find him. We find him lying listlessly on the ground. Frost formed on his lips. Such look of peacefulness and serenity. I knee down beside him trying to hear his breathing, or feel his pulse, or look for any sign of vitality – and I find none.

What is the use of doctors when we cannot resurrect?

Part 2 – Actors

In this war torn city of my homeland, people still need entertainment to have a reason to live on, to have something to take their minds off this God forsaken war.

I am not the main actor, just a bystander in the set that probably none will notice. I doubt if anyone knows how to act. That does not matter. The entertainment industry is run by gangsters. In fact, everything here is run by gangsters. I only learned of the movie’s plot days ago. The plot is pornographic. This war is pornographic.

Today, I am shocked to see three young actresses – acquaintances of mine – arrive at the set. The costume is majestically colorful and these actresses are happily trying out the costume. Do they know what they are getting into? Do I know what I am getting myself into?

I have decided to pull one of them aside during break and by the bench, I tell her the true plot. She is in tears and I have got to run, fast, before the gangsters get to me.  And I hope these actresses get away from the set as fast as I do.

Part 3 – Law Enforcer

In this war torn city of my homeland, order must be restored. We must choose side. Do I want to be amongst the gangsters who act on self-interest, occupy homes of others as pleased, take away the belongings of other as pleased, and bed the daughters and wives of others as pleased? Or do I want to be a law enforcer instead?

I choose to wear the uniform. On day one, I was with the squad of law enforcers, armed with old riffles and we shot at the marching mob. None of our riffles seemed to work. None of us seemed to be able to aim either.

On day two, there was no formation, pure street fight. Uniform and the non-uniform ones ran madly in the street shooting anything that moved. As days go by, we are vastly outnumbered. I fear wearing this uniform of mine. I fear even taking the public transport in the city.

Tonight, I am with the crowd, by the bench, almost run out bullets. As we observe the war that goes on in front of our eyes, one boy dressed in black turns to face me and asks why I do not shoot him. I reply that I only shoot people out there, at the war zone, who pose as threats to the law. I think, these kids can be my new friends. For all I know, this war could end right here right now.

Two gangsters emerge from the dark wearing white casting in one of the arms possibly due to war injury. Together, they drag me into a dark alley nearby. I scream for help and hope that my new friends would intervene.

But in war, there is no such thing as hope.

Part 4 – A conclusion written beyond my dreams

In this dark alley, I lie motionlessly on the ground hoping that the rescue team will arrive on time. Damn this God forsaken war. Damn this war torn city of my homeland.

PS 1 – Picture taken at Lantau Island, today.
PS 2 – I dreamed these dreams the night before watching “Atonement”. In case you wonder there may exist some casual connections had it be the other way round.

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